not a dream girl.... a real one. Let her come....

"and Ruth said, Entreat me not to leave thee, or to return from looling after thee: for whither thou goest, I will go; and where thou lodgest, I will lodge: they people shall be my people, and thy God my God: Where thou diest,will I die, and there will I be buried; the Lord do so to me, and more also,if aught but death part thee and me." Ruth 1: 16-17

For just today... think of her heart. what is she like? what is her insides about? Is she true, and pure? When she smiles at you does it light up  your world? Do you adore the way her eyes twinkle at you ? Can you tell when HER heart skips a beat? She walks across the room... and bends down kisses my ear. she whispers... "I love you" and walks away. yes I look at her ass.

how peaceful it is. how wonderful it feels. like a soft rain under a beautiful rainbow. promises of never inflicting pain again to you...but having the thing that nourishes your world. your body. your heart, your spirit. Is this "one day over the rainbow"?

It is my world because I want it to exist. someday it will. and I will not dwell on the past. I will have someone that wants me...just the way I am today. they adore me now. not in some dream world. They want to be with me wherever I am at because they love me.

update and life

Well..im sure that the people that used to follow my blogs will not find me here. I used to post and blog regularly on myspace, but when it changed...I just went to Facebook.. and now here I am. So I will not blog here.

I have nto written a blog or teh way my day went in quite sometime. about a year I guess. In that time, i reunited with my california dream girl.... and have been dumped by her yet once again. Im learning a new way of thinking, and a new way of life.  I am ready to accept life alone, if that is what God has for me.

i give a special thank you to my very special "prairie girl" whos letters I have taken from her tumbleweeds, and melted over her words. perhaps...someday, ill melt over her lips. I plan on it.

18 gears vs 30 years

Jul 5, 2010

18 gears vs 30 years

I so remember the days of my  youth...when I rode a bike for so long. I sure got my moneys worth out of that old otasco Flying O 10 speed. Ive learned alot about todays bicycles, but thats another story. I decided ill get me a cheap bike, and get back into shape and I can feel the wind on myface again...the way I used to. Peaceful. I used to ride when I got home from highschool, until dark every day for years. I rode well into my 20's. Some of my best memories ...so. off I go. got the walmart $88 mt. bike... woo hoo.  I hopped on it as soon as I could and took off down my dirt road. Now its alittle over 2 miles to the paved road...and its 1/2 mile to the "T" down the road... and I made it about 100 yards. lol. not to the T. lol. i thought I was going to die. So I googled this situation, and made adjustments. Raised the seat.... discovered there are 18 gears, not 6.. lol. and tried again. ive made it to the T...but yesterday I decided my mission was to make the pavement 2 miles away. My AZZ hurted with every freakin bump. apparently my butt was made of tough leather when i was  younger... maybe it was due ot the butt whuppins I got withthe wooden board i used to get in HS... I dont know. Maybe I should google "hurtin bike butt"? I think  I will. I noticed my heart was workin harder then I remember it... and I sweated like a pig in church. wait. ..thats not right. a ...well. anyway... I did make the pavement. but was afraid to go much further on the smooth pavement. I was noticing every hill, and could just see myself calling 911 ...help I cant get this freakin bike home again. ..Ithink Im gonna die. (and my azz hurts) So..i turned around. I figuired although its uphill mostly on the way back,  and its been 30 yrs since I rode...hey this dang thing has 18 gears right? the one I rode back then was only 10 speeds. well I used every gear and wished I had more. But I did make it back w/o pushing or having a seiszure. I thought about 911 though. I took a pic when I got back, and i think you can see the hurt lines in myface. what do you think? any suggestions? my goal is to get back into riding shape. Im open to suggestions.

Life

Jul 4, 2010

life

in times of uncertainty..(did I spell it right?) in times when you are nto sure of the future..and you wonder where you will wind up..? I think the whole country is close to this place. When you are confused, and bewildered about why this has happened...  I try to remember that you cannot recognize or appreciate the good tiems..when things are right and well within you and your world, if now and then, it does not come apart. Valleys are not forever. Neither are hilltops. and that is the ride we are on. Its the one thing you can count on....that things and tiems will change.

There is only one thing that doesnt change....He is the same yesterday, today, and forever.

During my latest trip to calif...some interesting things happened. the well house pump went out. that was a cool. $1000 bill. and on antoher day, recieved a call from a neighbor that one of my cows was in my front yard. it wasnt mine, it was another neighbors cow. apparently my yard/flowers are more attractive to the other cows. But all in all things are good. My g/f has cancer surgery soon...and I would appreciate your prayers for her.

I am not sure about this life of mine. There was a time when I th ought it was so well planned out. I wonder how many of you thought that at this stage and age of your life, you would be where  you are at?  I guess I will delay putting new siding up on the house..for a bit. But I still have the goal of getting that new disc, so I can plant winter wheat the first of sept. its not to far away.we shall see what direction this ride Im on goes from now til then. Im holding on, my hat pulled down low, and Ill look it in the eye.... with a few more wrinkles and gray hairs...At least the truck or tractor has not caught on fire, like it once did. lol.

Closed Caption Monster!

Closed Caption Monster!

ok.. i hate me. i do this ...i get so bored... sitting here watching tv...and I decided Id try something. silly me. ive managed to slim down to 2 remotes to work this stupid tv.. but I figured hey, wouldnt it be nice if when someone called, I could mute it, and still see the words. you know. ...and know how the movie ended... I can do this right? ugh. After all Im an accomplished man. College degree and all that. So i started looking at the longer remote..the one that controls the sound. Finally I see something called CC. and Sound options.. and this closed caption crap. Well i pushed something..and the words started coming across the screen. Trouble is, they keep coming! even when the sound is NOT muted! I finally got it to display in english. ugh. but I cant get it BACK to normal...or only when i mute it. ugh!! wheres a teenager when you need one? I should be able to do this ..im not 50 yet! you only lose your electronic talents, and start sitting on your balls when your 50 dammit! I should have one more good  year! Maybe Ill shoot this one...that always took care of my problems in the past... i been needin one of those flat screen things anyway. Well im gonna let the CC (i thought it was CC rider...not!)  button cool down...then try it again. stupid words are in the way!! ugh!!!

Dear Valentine

Feb 20, 2010

Dear Valentine

Take My Hand and walk with me, From where we are to where we will be. Love is a mystery.

We'll learn what life is as we go-- no map. no answers. All I know is this: I love you so.

All my love on Valentines Day and every day.

some days suck

Jan 31, 2010

some days suck.

some days just suck ya know? im not complaining...its just..I wish i could see them coming. an older couple that I have known a long time died yesteerday. their house blew up... a gas leak.. and he is still alive. he would be better off dead i think.  the snow and ice I have dealt with fairly well. You always think you are more prepared then you really are though... i lit the candles. and two indoor lanterns. i had plenty of light. but my one flashlight..rechargeable.. went dead way to soon. good thing there was antoher one in the garage. and when I fnally decided to fire up the generator..i couldnt find the can of starter fluid. ugh. I finally did find it, but the nozzle was gone. so i tried to use my fingernail to get in to squirt. then the rope broke. ugh. so i decided to go to town...after alli could get some gas, coffee. whatever.
on the way back... i passed one of those snow plows. you kow the blade was sitcking out inthe shoulder...then passed my turn off. i pulled over thinking Ill make a U turn...then the plow truck was coming...coming to fast. I was afraid it would hit me...so I made my u turn. that s when I realized that the truck does not turn tight AT ALL... when in 4wd. ugh. i did not make it back on the road..but I did go thru the bar ditch..it was 2 feet of snow...and no fences. so..I decided to floorboard it...or be stuck. i kept gong..and going... until finally i got to a road. I was back on the road I had missed. it could have been worse. and Im not even going to discuss relationship troubles. ugh. all on this same day..

well sparkys alive. im only missing one cat and one cow. my place has not burned down..and i am not still alive after being burned up. now that would be a bad day.

its just another day in oklahoma...

winter wonderland

Jan 8, 2010

winter wonderland

what a winter so far. i predict at least one more snow storm in feb too. a white out on christmas eve... i think i can still hear bing crosby singin some stupid song.... about a white christmas. im chopping ice on the pond so the cows can drink. and why must they wait til its 5 deg to have a new born calf? no babies lost yet.  a slight miscalculation means im on my last bale of hay... and i need more quickly! but ill find some..these handy dandy windows i got are working well with this wood burnin stove. it feels like grampas house...so hot you have to freakin hang your head out the window...(that tilts for ya.. the window that is..) just to suck in some fresh cold air.  at 90 deg...inside...it feels like yoru skin is sweating and sliding off of your body...and your new leather recliner..is...well. lets not go there.
someday Ill learn how many logs NOT to put on the fire...the kitties are not frozen...  yet.

I wonder who ordered up all this cold stuff? i havent fallen yet. not yet. only one water leak, and theres a frozen cow in the ice ..that used to be the pond. ill go cut some meat off her back side tomrrow.i can cook it on my woodburnin stove. nothing too funny going on..i havne tdone anything toooooo stupid lately. but im over due. Me and sparkys still alive....and doing ok. happy new year everybody!

Merry Christmas yall!

Dec 13, 2009

Merry Christmas yall!

i have a g/f that had this great idea. shes learned to do short phone videos (no wise cracks! lol) and decided we shall do daily songs to each other..until Christmas. ive roasted my nuts over the fire (if you dont know the words you have ot make them up), ive caught Sammy kissin Santa Claus, sang yingle yells yingle yells.., and had a blue chirstmas w/o you. but do you know how many days it is from dec 1 to christmas? thats right.. 25 songs. now its getting challenging....and the music on on the satilite radio... and old movies sing them on the turner classic movie channel. ok so maybe I should try a diff channel and new tastes.

the new hand made amish stove is also roasting my chest n nuts out of this house! i have to learn to handle the temp of it... im like one of those little old men. 14 deg outside. and 88 deg inside! with the windows (which are new and im still paying for) are OPEN...  but at least I havent burned the house down.

its a sentimental time...and the weather is cold one day, and hot another. (68 today) Sparky is good, and im semi busy with indoor projects trying to ManUp my mancave. now to finish filling the girls stockings. okok i know they are grown. but i have a great time pretnding they are still kids, an d putting the stupidest things I can find in them...with the envelope of money which they really want....inside. besides candy, i need to find other stuff. like a plastic tiarra...so they can pose with pictures as princesses. nothing for a 22 yr old huh? She graduated from college yesterday. now for the 18 yr old.

I have wood to cut, and things to do. my little house in the ....boondocks....is starting to look better. Ive met some old friends online....after many years...(except wendy!) and it was nice to finally see them in person. And I still believe in old romance, mistletoe,  and "true love" are you sick yet? i think I am. 

so. on Christmas day... the girls will be away with their mom...and Ill be "living the dream" here... me and sparky.  Its not as bad as it sounds... in fact its ok. Thats how it is here ...this country christmas 2009

the new ekg

Oct 30, 2009

the new ekg.

I remember watchin dad as I grew up.... getting these little wires hooked up to him.. they called it an EKG. those were the old days... at the ER ...it seemed tobe an all day experience.  now years later... things have changed so much.

its a quicky now.  you go in, and poof. some nurse (she wasnt bad lookin!) unsnaps your shirt...lays you down... and starts putting these little sticky snapy thingys on you to hook u the wires. then she says.. undo your pants...i have to put two on your hip bone. I dont remember that back in the ER...but ok. now it was drafty. but they went poof...and presto. it was done. they said the squiggly lines were all normal. i think the nurse was cravin me, yeah...cuz she made me take all the stickyh things off myself!! what kind of service is that? two days later I found one still stuck to me! i guess I missed one...

Ill probably have to make payments on those squiggly lines that took about 30 secs to do.. after insurance is done! ugh. id say each little squiggly line cost me about ten bucks.

I asked em to tighten the bolts in my neck but they just looked at me funny. they also said they didnt do fangs, or claws...but scheduled a stress test. that should be interesting. I can see myself now... shoes, sweats, a treadmill, and me running like the 6 mill dollar man.  "hes up to 60 mph!".

at least i got some sample viagras from him! yeah.

the green mile

Sep 28, 2009

the green mile

The night is quiet, and the window by my bed is crystal clear. the moon is half, and the steel blue colored clouds stretch in rippled waves across the night sky. a pale reflection of moon light is spread around as it peeks in between the clouds, and make little silver linings on each rippled band of clouds. the wind is breezy... and blows myhair.. the trees seem to be alive with the sounds of frogs and locusts singing...

this night is like all the others. quiet. and alone. I wonder many things on nights such as these. Each day my life is alittle shorter. I stumble through week to week... seeking the answers to questions i may never solve. I realize now... that this journey is mine. And there will be no one to go with me through it. It makes me consider what the total results of my presence on earth has been thus far? If I disappeared..would the locusts or frogs know it? Would there be a space where I once existed even as big as small space between those clouds.. 

each day the sun rises... and today I saw 2 butterflies... my quest may continue and be unresolved... but it is mine all the same. So until the last day, I will keep on going. This is my journey. Living with my failures, living with what I almost had, trying to enjoy what I wind up with. This ... is my green mile....

you cant travel it as much as you can feel it. can you feel it?

the shower door install

Aug 23, 2009

the shower door install

well the time finally arrived.... that old door was leaking leaking.. so i did it. first i tore the old one down... it took me a bit to figure how it came off. lol. i realized it was just kinda stuck...and the trim work had pieces that fit inside of each other...so i couldnt see the screws ... then the new item.

directions. boy. some lame drunk drew the pictues of the instruction books shower door.  you could tell which way it was opening... you wouldn t think this was important..but the directions said... be sure and install the pivot plate  here..and the strike plate there.. well. ya cant tell...by looking. so ..i figured... pivot..tha tmust be the side with hinges right? and strike..the side that the door shuts up against. ok. now. the bottom thingy. does it go this way or that way. i put it in 3 times. ..thats my usuall number of times before i figure it out. lol. now it said... before you put this in... measure from point A to  the handle on the strike plate..provided you knwowhat that is... and subtract 8/16's of an inch from that.. and..

i forgot to tell you i cant read a measuring tape. something about being too brilliant to ever learn..or some other problem... i got the simple measurements down... but just never mastered a tape measure. so. i eye balled it. im a good eye baller...

well. its up. the door shuts. i caulked the crap out of it. now. for this morning smoke test.. or rather... water test.... to see if it leaks...

so in spite of the pivot plates, shock plates, and that pesky measuring requirement.. i got th stupid thing up. I wonder if that bathroom leans alittle? cuz the door...well. its ... slanted? hey. as long as it shuts and dont leak right?

wish me luck.

big and shiny it is

Aug 13, 2009

big and shiny it is...

I knew it would be pretty..and the big shiny stainless steel icebox would match my other appliances too. Finally...i can give the old ice box to someone that needs it bad. it is nice.. and has crushed ice and... ut oh. NO water line.. never needed one. but the day before the arrival of the big pretty icebox., i decided to try it...install a water line myself. I knew id have to crawl under the house... I got my friend lavoise to come over and be my helper.. and I carefully got all my tools together. I know me...and I tend to have to redo stuff when I do projects, and I knew being under the house..would suck.

I eyeballed the crawlspace... and began slithering thru. When I saw how little the spaces were between the damp ground, and the rafters... thats when I said..."houston.. we have a problem".. but I was on a mission. So...i cralwed. dragging my trusty power drill with me. smart as I am, I was gonna drill UP... not down..that way I wouldnt hit another waterline! I crawled until I finally got there...and realized..I had forgotten the copper water line. ugh. After crying, kicking, and bumping my head on soemthing... i yelled for help. I hate doing that. Luckily..my helpers little boy...bravely scampered under the house with the waterline in tow... boyhe got around under there way better then I did. We stretched the line... and now was the time to drill UP... the hole goes under the drawer... of the bottom cabinet...next to the the fridge... and wouldnt you knw it... i have TWO extra holes...outside the cabinet....right thru the carpet...(I always have to do it 3 times). I thought man... no wonder you cant get a plummer to do this crap. He cant get down here, and its too freakin hard.. ThenI got stuck. I swear Im not that big. But I was. that when I changed frequencies from Houston to LORD? getme OUT! and I did... in a bit... lets not talk about the ropes and sirens...popcorn, and other activities like the national gaurd and firedepartment...

But finally. There it is. Big shiny. the first time I turned the water on..it leaked like a sift. (what IS a sift??)  but I got it done. ill give it the 24 hour watch for leaks... and hope that tomrrow, ill have ice! and cold water in the door! yeah!

now...for the new shower door I have to install. that ll be another story. wheres my drill?

motorcycle blues

Aug 6, 2009

motorcycle blues

well I did it. I sold my cycle. just today. sigh. funny how you dont utilize or appreciate somethign when you have, but when you feel the loss of it, then you miss it. lol. of course I know I am better off w/o it. no more zipping around at 90 mph.  and my kids are going to be glad that I sold it too....

im not sure why i felt the need to blog it though...sigh. yee hawww. no more payments! but for now... ive the the blues...the I dont have a cycle blues...sniff. just pictures!

Virgins windows OMG

Aug 1, 2009

VIRGIN windows..OMG....

ok so I had this great plan...i cant seem to measure a window twice and get the same results, so I decided to have handy dandy home depot come out and give me the free estimate. ( I was just gonna get the measurements and do it myself you see) dont do that. the handy dandy man came. he had a great sales pitch. demo windows, and the little cut out versions of what your piece of crap window you now have looks like in the inside (of the frame)..and what this high tech piece of art looks like on the inside... but remember...this is not a purchase...this is an investment. right? he said so. he said alot of really catchy informative stuff. you know...the rq / ra insulatived reflective number being below 2.3 and all that stuff. very good to know... after all. its EIGHT freakin damn THOUSAND dollars of windows. (the freakin damn part was custom and therefore a slightly extra cost..but well worth it!) AND... these were not regular windows... no sir reee..

let me explain...you see the regular windows you see at the home depot store...that tilt and all that. are NOT these special windows. THESE windows were like ...first designed for famous people. ..so being close to famous..(just undiscovered) im thinkin yeah. my windows... the guy said..the store windows would be the little league team , and THESE windows would be the world series winner team... see? THESE windows tilt and swivel... they have a life time this and that garantee...and you cant get windows made out of airplane stuff. I tried to bend the frames, you just cant do it. and the screens...they are especially distasteful to bugs. I tasted one. they suck. AND a life time warranty too... and HEY!!! he showed me how  you just takeem out of the frames.. poof. they clean them selves! thats right! self cleaning freakindamn windows. with life time shit on em. now what do you think? huh? huh? all yo do is runnum under water and putem back in..and wipem down. poof. they all cleaned up!!

oh and the best part. they are made out of VIRGIN vynyl... thats right. aint that sexy? I think that means they are beter then sex. who needs a woman? I got high protein bars, self cleanin sexed up windows, and a dog that I am sure can learn to vacumn! heck he barks at it now! thats just two paws from vacumin! so all i have to do is pay for the whole freakin damn thing...... and presto. im good to go.

i tell you what. im a freakin rocket scientist. oh!!! AND i ordered a NEW icebox... ( i found out they call em refridgerators now) AND it has that water thing in the door and all. but that s a whole nother blog...just you wait...

What I learned this Year 2009

Jul 28, 2009

What I learned this year...

its half way into the year of 2009. the year of 2008 was the best year of my life, but I have to pause about this time of year, to evaluate what things i have learned this year.

that some blogs are funny, some are serious. funny ones are appreciated more.
how to install a dishwasher w/o flooding the floor.
how to install a overhead microwave/venthood w/o burning ME up...or hte house.
how to love a dog. How to wait on things I cant see, w/o going crazy...ok...crazier.
To enjoy good times, as they just do not last...except as a memory in your heart.
That Elvis really has left the building...
to love with all my heart, body, and soul. To give up something because i love it enough to let it go.
How to make a carport completely disappear.
That chocolate comes in high protein bars...
that some people just choose to live in their fear...
that being beautiful on the outside is just as important as being beautiful on the inside. (it is too!)
that someday over the rain bow.... is still a dream... that may never come true.
that God works very slowly when it comes to hard heads.... maybe so itll soak in or something. ugh.
that hitting a tractor wheel with yoru fist because it is stuck will break your hand.
that I am tougher then I thought I was..i mean... just as tough as I knew I was. yeah.
that the truck runs better on ice when its in 4wd.
that you can arrest 5 people in one night.
that even when those you love are gone, they are not really gone. not in Sundances World anyway..
that it still can be a 70 deg difference in the weather in oklahoma in a 24 hour period.
that there might be one person that is more stubborn then I am.
that cats really are naughty aliens from another world that were banned as punishment to earth... for the rest of their lives. (field goal!)
that running is not the answer...


im looking forward to the list of things I have yet to learn the rest of this year.

Elvis has left the building

Jul 14, 2009

Elvis has left the building

ok i did it. finally i did it. i forgot ONE time to shut the stupid door to the hen h ouse, and now Elvis has indeed left the building.... in a coons mouth. yep. EP is dead. I already miss his crowing. he would run right up to the back door, and start crowing while he ate the cats food. ugh.

Then the AC to the police car went out...thats $445.16 .. then not least but last... I somehow for the first time in my life, lost cash. ugh. about $160 must of fell out of my pockets of my shorts. so. what a day. momma said thered be days like this..days like this... lol.

ok. well. i have cool air now. i have money...2 bucks. lol. and I have nothing to have to be home by dark for now ... just locke up th ehen house and forget it. no more hens for awhile!

I still have my fav cat. If I can have a cat that I can call a favorite that is. Blackie is still around. all the rest of my 8 cats are gone/dead or beamed up by Elvis i guess. maybe they didnt like dogfood. sparkys still here. good thing he dont have thumbs, or hed be driving the new ac car down the road to better dog food.

so when all these crappy things happen... remember to repeat the following phrase..:

scooby scooby do!!  now... you cant really treat crappy days seriously if your reciting scooby phrases can you? I dont think so.  oh well. the week is half over, and its gonna cool down to the mid 90s here...
thats how it is... here in oklahoma today.
scooby scooby dooo!

Me and the Bachelors

Jul 2, 2009 ok so i message a few. This one smokes dope..just an occassional one mind you... and that one has 15 kids, this one smokes...and that one is just plain crazy nuts. ugh. Another ones picture did not reflect who she really was or looked like. it was 40 lbs ago, and im thinking it might be her sister anyway. She says.."well I havent changed that much anyway" ugh. 

And then theres that first meeting. geesh. you know in 15 seconds... that its a no. And once in a while it takes a 2nd date... to know. Meanwhile me and sparky mow the yard. well. I do. sparky just continues being the dog around the house. Elvis the rooster is all thats left now. The coons got to them all one night...so now its just us bachelors. At least the cat s havin some action, she had kittens!

So I talk to God and wonder what weird mysterious plan He has... and how it will be to turn 50 and still live in this desolate place alone. I guess He has something going on up there, that has disallowed the "big Picture". surely its not ME. Im so flexible, and ... whats the opposite of hard headed?.....

I wonder how everyone else is doin ? if you ever have similar thoughts? Myabe your rooster has LOTS of hens... lol. Maybe you like being alone? I wonder how that works. aint got it figured out yet. But Im all over that. Me and the bachelors...go Elvis, go Sparky, go me.

Me and the Bachelors

well at first glance, this internet dating idea sounded so good. just a great idea. But well.. its not so much I think. Y ou sit down, and go thru a big catalog, and look at this one and that one... too fat, too ugly...to fat and to ugly.... and then you feel shallow. lol. but hey, thats what the pictures are for right? If you were car shoppin youd not pick a car that didnt suit you wo uld you? I dont want that station wagon, but boy, its got a great radio in it! NOT.

new phase of life

June 17, 2009
this morning i made the time to sit on the back step, and sip my cup of coffee. no interuptions.. i noticed the way the sun rising relfected off of the clouds in the south. It was sure beautiful. I wonder how many times I just did not notice this? I wonder how many sights such as this, that I just missed? And then I wonder what else am I missing? maybe I just wonder too much. lol.

I have been single for 6 years now. Im getting older. I am sure this is something someone reading this might identify with. Its a phase of my life I did not intend to enter alone. But I guess I will be alone..and I cannot afford to make more plans for "if" or "when" she comes to be with me in my life... Sound familar? So I will try hard to adjust to the thought and mindset of living my life alone, and being content with it. I do not think I will ever be happy wiht it. But content doesnt sound all so bad at this point.

So. step one... focus on the blessings. on the things that bring me peace and joy. sparky...baby calves....sunsets...coffee on the back step..instead of the problems in front of me which seem neverending. step two: get busier... its summertime. get out side. enjoy th eblue sky. Winter will come soon enough. and lastly... talk to God alot. Somehow acknowledging that He knows what im doing and where Im at helps me to do it more contentedly. (is that a word?)

Ive made my pleas. ive made my requests. Now I will look at my place in life, and be proud of who and what Ive stood for, and continue on. but without the expectation of a mate. aww who needs a mate anyway right? zone bars are tasting pretty good. shed probably wanna drive my tractor anyway.... and id have to share my toys.

so off.... to the next phase of life.... with a new mindset.

Sparkys Hair Dog Clone

Apr 8, 2009

Sparkys Hair Dog Clone

WEll today was the last training day, so I should be good for the year. I thought I d get me anice new log splitter, but i found out that I cannot use my tractors current hydrolic hook up.... and by the timeI put antoher one on there, Id be better off to just buy one wiht a motor on it. So...I priced them. whew. they are HIGH.
so this sparky the dog thing.... its going pretty well. I think this dog might be smarter then some people I know. I wonder if he can draw a check? hmmm. There is a problem though.... its the hair. geesh. i can comb him, and comb him, and get no hair. but if I pet him with my hand, the hair jumps on me..and tries to overtake me! its like... attack of the sparky hair... so I thought hell. I can make me a whole nother dog with the hair I pet off this one! so I did! yep. a life size sparky replica! course the hair was..well. not right. its hard to get it all to go the same way, like God did it on sparky. I wonder how many dogs He made before he got the hair to all run the same way? Anyway.... the first time "HairSparky" barked I swatted him and said no...and well. killed him! now theres just a mess of freakin hair. ruin a good vacum cleaner. surely theres something I can do with all of it..besides throw it out. Myabe i could sell it as.... BigFoot hair on ebay or soemthing...  Until then, Ill just have to get a better comb. maybe I can teach sparks to comb him self. hey he can lick his own ass. why shouldnt he be able to comb himself? At least he looks good in a red bandana.

stupid stuff I do

Mar 12, 2009

stupid stuff I do

ok.. I have done it again... caught myself doing something so stupid, that I had to laugh about it later. Come on now... I know there are others out there that have done similar things... unless I am really an Alien living among an outside species! I was talking to my friend jenner... and had recently gotten a coffee maker Id loaned to her back. But I coujldnt find the cord! I told her...Jenner... the cord is gone..where did you put it? you lost it? where is it? she kept saying... its in the back, its in the back. WEll?? I looked at the back. not there. Then she used the words..."in the cord keeper"... now jenner is from wisconsin, and they just almost speak a different language..(and I think IM the alien?) so I asked..what the hell is a cord keeper? And she then explained there is a (secret hidden) compartment in the back that the cord is stored in. duh. SO.... today, and I just happened to be talking to jenner again.... I noticed that I needed to resize the picture on the tv. I needed the right remote. Now I have had this same tv system for 5 years... so I started looking for this 4th remote. you know...one for DISH, one for this one for that... I looked all over. Under the couch, in the kitchen... and of course jen gets the play by play description.. Where the hell is tha t 4th remote? Then I realized... ugh. I dont have 4 remotes. I have 3 remotes. thats why I couldnt find it! it dont exist!! DUMASS! ugh. sure enough on the 3rd remote.... i found the resize the picture button.. More laughter from jenner.  ok maybe this is one of those days where im not on all 8 cylinders again.... hmmm

A Special Walk

Mar 8, 2009

A Special Walk..

Sometimes you see with eyes of your own, and sometimes.. you see with another view. And things are not as they seem after all. You walk thru the woods, and you see the awesomeness of nature.. and the beauty of the skies, the colors of the sunset. You swear  you hear the sounds of past life, playing along the creek you now walk. You speak to God but there is silence. all you hear is the wind...And you wonder what tomorrow will bring. Will you take the time to notice?
A calf runs...he feels so free and young. He feels good. He creeps closer to you, and even licks  yoru fingers. but his mother walks slow and seems to groan with every step. My own steps falter just alittle... and I feel incomplete.
How beautiful is the smile of young love...how tragic is the sadness of great loss..There is life, and there is death. and something in between. I wonder what will be said about my in between?
I walk, and listen to the song of birds, I see with eyes that see my way. But I can see with more then eyes. I can hear with more then ears..and although this walk is sometimes like the old animal... I remember it is once ...every so often... as the run of the young calf.
 I remember a time....not so far past, when I could see with young eyes, with a young heart...And I yearn for the days of the rose colored glasses, to see what is joyful, to feel what is peaceful, and to be, for a moment in time, the last piece. Complete. 

All 8 cylinders

Mar 3, 2009

All 8 Cylinders

You know your not clicking on all 8 cylinders...when:
you find urself standing wet and naked, water turned off, and cant remember if you washed your hair...
you cant say what youve eaten that day!
you realize you havent shaved for a week..
when you look in your empty icebox and think.. ive got enough..
when you forget to comb your hair, and your already on your way to work!
when you almost swallow the splenda package because you put the whole thing in your cup of coffee!
when you have to dump splenda out of the coffee filter, when making coffee..(use the coffee son...)
when you realize its noon, and you have not let the poor chickens out of their little house...
when you "wake up" and find that your driving in the middle of the road instead of your side! (road hog)
Ill add more when I think of them.. feel free to list some of your "all 8 cylinders" experiences!

bitch on a rope!

Feb 25, 2009

bitch on a rope!

today was such a nice day, i decided to go outside and take a walk. But everytime I moved wrong, my ribs hurt.  you see I was helpin a friend move something very heavy..(500 lbs) and it slipped and the corner caught me in the ribs. I think i cracked one... it even makes my back hurt. no deep breaths, no sneezing, and NO coughing! But a mild walk is ok. On the way back, I noticed a calf that was on top of the storm celler (OUTSIDE the fence). the little bitch. lol. it was almost dark or I coulda just shooed her in a gate, but it would take to long to shut gates, and unlock this one..and all that. so I cornered her inside the chicken run, and got a rope, and roped her. Thats when I remembered that Ihurt. lol. I did most of the dragging. And I didnt think about the pain much, until after I got the rope off her. Then I discovered I needed to breathe.. i couldnt... so I coughed. Remind me to just open the gates in the dark next time! Times like these need to be shared with someone!

mid winter blues

Jan 24, 2009

Mid Winter Blues

Current mood:melancholy

The day is sunny, and the sky is blue. The wind seems constant, and its very cold. Its one of those look warm, but freeze days. Some days this old house seems much emptier then it used to. Its these kinds of days that make me stop, and wonder. I and hate that, cuz wondering leads to thinking... and that seems to make my head hurt. Then first thing ya know, theres this burning smell, and smoke. Then ya hear those sirens. and firetrucks, but its only me... being "thoughtful".
Its very dry in oklahoma. the 3rd driest year since 1929. I look around, and wonder why rain has not come yet. I see the 4 new calves ...they run and play.Isee the deer, and wild turkey crossing my place. I see the beautiful sunsets. I feel peace, but also disconnected. Sometimes I think I will just be alone forever, but I feel as though there is supposed to be someone else here. Its just a feeling. If I think about it too much, therell be firetrucks.
then I remember, it is just that time of year. mid winter. cold. barren. thats when it seems the hardest. It makes a man wonder about his life, and what he has stood for, and where or how long, he has yet to go. About the few friends, if he has any at all....he has. I saw my daughters 6 days ago. They are very busy. I get a text message now and then. Im proud of them.
I better put some bluegrass music on.... I hear sirens again.

Merry Christmas

Dec 4, 2008

Merry CHRISTmas!

*Twas the month before Christmas*
*When all through our land,*
*Not a Christian was praying*
*Nor taking a stand.*
*The politically correct police had taken away,*
*The reason for Christmas - no one could say.*
*The children were told by their schools not to sing,*
*About Shepherds and Wise Men and Angels and things.*
*It might hurt people's feelings, the teachers would say*
*December 25th is just a  " Holiday ".*
*Yet the shoppers were ready with cash, checks and credit*
*Pushing folks down to the floor just to get it!*
*CDs from Madonna, an X BOX, an I-pod*
*Something was changing, something quite odd! *
*Retailers promoted Ramadan and Kwanzaa*
*In hopes to sell books by Franken & Fonda.*
*As Targets were hanging their trees upside down*
*At Lowe's the word Christmas - was no where to be found.*
*At K-Mart and Staples and Penny's and Sears*
*You won't hear the word Christmas; it won't touch your ears.*
*Inclusive, sensitive, Diversity*
*Are words that were used to intimidate me.*
*Now Daschle, Now Darden, Now Sharpton, Wolf Blitzen*
*On Boxer, on Rather, on Kerry, on Clinton !*
*At the top of the Senate, there arose such a clatter*
*To eliminate Jesus, in all public matter.*
*And we spoke not a word, as they took away our faith*
* Forbidden to speak of salvation and grace*
*The true Gift of Christmas was exchanged and discarded*
*The reason for the season, stopped before it started.*
*So as you celebrate "Winter Break" under your "Dream Tree"*
*Sipping your Starbucks, listen to me.*
*Choose your words carefully, choose what you say*
*Shout MERRY CHRISTMAS, not Happy Holiday!*

Are You Smater then a ....Carport?

Are you Smarter then a .... Carport?

As most of you know, about a month ago, my pretty red tractor shelter just blew plum away. it wrapped itself around the well house...and in short, I took two fences down, and drug it away upside down.... into the pasture. After I rebuilt the fences,  took the side walls apart leaving only the metal support beams sticking up. I thought it was secure..
I just came home..after the insurance guy finally showed up.... I took a little trip and was gone for about 4 days. It was a very nice 4 days. My youngest daughter watched the house, and fed the critters. When I got home, being a trained and observant investigator...kinda like that guy on that tv series...the mentalist... or sherlock freakin holmes...so I noticed that the carport roof was now on TOP of the barn. ugh. My daughter said well dad.... i  thought it had blown away... and looked out the door..."yep. its on top the barn. ". geesh.
So I drug it off the barn... without too much damage to the barn and decided to take all the sheet metal off the top, as it landed right side up! One end was stickin way up in the air...about 15 feet, so I decided to just crawl up there on top and take all the sheet metal off that end at once... duh. Im such a rocket scientist. Of course that was all that held the thing together.and when i took th emetal off...it collapsed.
Now I knew that when I heard the sound of crunching metal, and felt nothing but air beneath my feet.... that I might be in trouble...but I got lucky and missed the metal pile on the ground, and then my old ninja training kicked in as i deftly (is that a word?) rolled on the ground and jumped up with a flying side kick. yeah. ok 30 min later after I stopped crying, I drove my sorry ass to the house on the 4 wheeler.
I looked at the situation, and decided to pack it in for the evening...maybe Ill take pictures and feed the suggested plan of action into the military err..i dont know...somewhere...for my next move... or maybe Ill just ummm... try it again. It wont be as high next time right? Wheres that extra pair of hands I been waitin on??
and wheres my dang insurance check??

Oklahoma wind..

Nov 6, 2008

Oklahoma wind...

It only happens when you think things are going well.... and maybe your getting ahead. You start to think, how good things are, and how nice this Christmas will be.. and how your actually going to have some money maybe....saved!
Then... the Oklahoma wind comes. oh heck it blows here all the time, but this time it really came. No tornado, no rain, just wind. And it blows your brand new carport completely away, and it lands on the wellhouse roof...(it leaked anyway). sigh.
Okkkklahoma....(sing it with me!) Where the wind comes sweepin down the plain.... and the carports gone, and the roofs gone too, and the real storm isnt even here.... oooooo klahoma ....
Well Ill put some pics up. Notice the excitement in the expression on my face. Im just freakin thrilled. It coulda been worse though, the nice truck parked under that carport was not touched, and neither was anything else. Maybe God didnt like that color.... or the stupid mexicans didnt put the anchors where I told them to. Thats my last piece of business with eagle carports!
So im off on another quest, clean up and replace.... this time ...with concrete foundation....

getting a life

Oct 21, 2008

Have you ever noticed that if your around an animal much, you tend to mimick it some? Ive learned to crow ..not too bad either..... like my rooster Elvis. He thinks its alittle obnoxious I think. But Im getting better. (get a life?) So last night I got  home late, and the hens were already up...so I shut the door. Later in the night I wondered....what if there were a coon in there?  Id just find him and some dead hens the next morning.... and bang. So... about 6 am.... which is Elvis's wake up call time... I heard nothing. ten after..... nothing. I knew Elvis was dead.... so I took the gun and the flash light...down to the hen house. I peered thru the door. And there was that lazy Elvis... no dead hens, and no coon. Everyone was just sleepin late.
So I crowed real loud, and about gave Elvis a heart attack! He stretched his neck out and cocked his head as he looked at me...like.."what the ..."? On the way back.... I heard a voice in my head.... maybe it was the spirit of Elvis? it said.."you are the man...but...GET A LIFE!"
Some body slap me!

Bulls and People

Sep 16, 2008

Can a "kitchen retard" draw a check?

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• Oct 14, 2008
  Bulls and people. ugh. Ever notice the similarities? I have a bull, his name isyou know these people that draw these monthly checks? you knwo the ones that are smarter then me, and dont have to work, cuz they are "disabled"? well.. Im a kitchen retard. I wonder if I could draw a check on that? I made an executive decision, thats right. I put my foot down. and I decided that I was gonna make me some chocolate chip cookies. This was awhile back, but I figured, I dont need some woman to take care of me! Ill just do the recipie on the back of the chip sack. sounds easy. ok cool. So.. I get all the stuff out... and thats when I discovered what how disabled I am in the kitchen. I had long ago decided that Id keep the flour and sugar in these big glass jars, that used to be used for big big pickle jars! then there would be no bugs or problems! Im so smart. and when I tried to get the flour out... uh, the measureing scoop would not fit into the jar. that meant I had to use a smaller one, but that is not the same size as the size the recipie called for! so I decidded to use the smaller one, and then pack it in the bigger one! then on the way OUT of the jar with the flour, it got caught.... (never jerk a measuring cup wiht flour in it).. and poof. It looked like a bomb went off. I looked like Casper.... and flour was everywhere. I did get the cookies made, but for some reason they were not as good. And the mess was...well. a mess. Why doesnt hte recipies have a video or at least some pictures? or maybe some special packaging with special instructions for us special people?

can a "kitchen retard" draw a check?

Sep 16, 2008

Can a "kitchen retard" draw a check?

you know these people that draw these monthly checks? you knwo the ones that are smarter then me, and dont have to work, cuz they are "disabled"? well.. Im a kitchen retard. I wonder if I could draw a check on that? I made an executive decision, thats right. I put my foot down. and I decided that I was gonna make me some chocolate chip cookies. This was awhile back, but I figured, I dont need some woman to take care of me! Ill just do the recipie on the back of the chip sack. sounds easy. ok cool. So.. I get all the stuff out... and thats when I discovered what how disabled I am in the kitchen. I had long ago decided that Id keep the flour and sugar in these big glass jars, that used to be used for big big pickle jars! then there would be no bugs or problems! Im so smart. and when I tried to get the flour out... uh, the measureing scoop would not fit into the jar. that meant I had to use a smaller one, but that is not the same size as the size the recipie called for! so I decidded to use the smaller one, and then pack it in the bigger one! then on the way OUT of the jar with the flour, it got caught.... (never jerk a measuring cup wiht flour in it).. and poof. It looked like a bomb went off. I looked like Casper.... and flour was everywhere. I did get the cookies made, but for some reason they were not as good. And the mess was...well. a mess. Why doesnt hte recipies have a video or at least some pictures? or maybe some special packaging with special instructions for us special people?

can a "kitchen retard" draw a check?

Sep 16, 2008

Can a "kitchen retard" draw a check?

you know these people that draw these monthly checks? you knwo the ones that are smarter then me, and dont have to work, cuz they are "disabled"? well.. Im a kitchen retard. I wonder if I could draw a check on that? I made an executive decision, thats right. I put my foot down. and I decided that I was gonna make me some chocolate chip cookies. This was awhile back, but I figured, I dont need some woman to take care of me! Ill just do the recipie on the back of the chip sack. sounds easy. ok cool. So.. I get all the stuff out... and thats when I discovered what how disabled I am in the kitchen. I had long ago decided that Id keep the flour and sugar in these big glass jars, that used to be used for big big pickle jars! then there would be no bugs or problems! Im so smart. and when I tried to get the flour out... uh, the measureing scoop would not fit into the jar. that meant I had to use a smaller one, but that is not the same size as the size the recipie called for! so I decidded to use the smaller one, and then pack it in the bigger one! then on the way OUT of the jar with the flour, it got caught.... (never jerk a measuring cup wiht flour in it).. and poof. It looked like a bomb went off. I looked like Casper.... and flour was everywhere. I did get the cookies made, but for some reason they were not as good. And the mess was...well. a mess. Why doesnt hte recipies have a video or at least some pictures? or maybe some special packaging with special instructions for us special people?

Home health care..I think I need some...

sept 16, 2008

Home Health Care... I need some.

what do you do when your bad day ....is a bad day at home? Ill have to ask some retired folks... I mean..Im already home. where do I go for relief? Im up to a challenge, well most the time...  but some days I just dont click on all 8 cylinders.
it all started this morning when I went to let the chickens out. I discovered that I left the hen house open, and wouldnt you know it, this was the night the coons decided to check to see if I was serving McChicken. I was. I lost two hens. poor girls. I told the rest of em to start workin double time, or they were next.  ok not the end of the world. So...I decided to to to town, and the main goal was to hit walmart, aned get some needed items. I of course forgot that too, and thus the cats are hungry today. I wonder what else I have forgotten? and who needs bread?
so ... I decided to move the air compressor to the new shop. and thats when I found the BIG tire on the creature (jd 4020) flat. ugh. Upon further inspection i discovered that the valve stem was bad... and so no problem . I just unscrewed it so I could replace it. That s when I found out that someone (previous owner) put prestone in the tires. Its surprisign how much can squirt out in your face and down your arms in just a nano second. you know prestone has a distinct taste. of course its highly posionous. and sticky. yes its sticky. And I had no vavle stem to replace it with. so... I decided I better use that heavy duty high jack to lift up alittle, and relieve the weight on that tractor tube. maybe I could save that. I remember once...being knocked out by the bar when I failed to push it all the way down before it "clicked". so I was careful! So I jacked it up, and the bottom of the jack went thru the first layer of rock under the carport, and sunk down into the ground out of sight. great. I dug tha tout and put a double 2/4 under that. course it broke in half. but I did relieve some pressure. so I took a shower, and now im hungry. seems someone forgot to get groceries.
I hate it when criss leaves me for about 30,000 days.... I need a sitter!
I think Ill just stay home tonight and watch tv ...wheres my chocolate chips...

Thank God for OFF

Aug 1, 2008

life on the ranch

Thank God for OFF.

Well Im sitting here at a stupid computer, after 2 cups of coffee, staring out the window viewing what I consider to be a very peaceful setting. I feel kinda like being on vacation, and have not quite gotten used to not getting up and going to work everyday to some office job. But Im getting there!
the mexicans are out there building my shop now, and i just know they are gonna try to not do it like I want it done, and steal my ladder! But i am all over that, Ill tell you that. Maybe when it is done, it will actually not leak, and not blow down, and be a good thing.
Im thinking its time to spray the pastures, but the cost of desiel is ...well.... maybe I wont spray it. the cows dont know that the grass is more expensive for them to eat ..so...I guess I shouldnt fret too much.  my 6 calves dont have a clue how good they have it either. lol. I think one of em is a retard though. I didnt know that animals could be so different from each other... some are smart, some are nervous, etc. This one calf, hes a retard. He figured out a way to get through a fence, then didnt have enough sense to walk thru an open gate. oh no no, hed rather watch me sweat my ass off in shorts and sandels thru the deep grass and chiggers shooing him up and down the fence line, until he finally goes in a little hole down in the ditch, and gets back across. I patched that sucker so he wont do that again. Maybe he was just havin some entertainment with me hmmmm...
I wonder who was the retard from his perspective? hmmmm.
Thank God for OFF.

the funny stuff of life

Jul 14, 2008

the funny stuff of life

have you ever looked at a cloud and saw Under Dog? or... a crocodile? Or found yourself laughing alone, at ... a chicken? those stupid hens. I finally got 2 eggs in one day! I guess that little talk I had with them is paying off. But there laggers!!! So ..Im going to have to maybe eat one this winter. maybe in front of the rest of em. and tell them... that I eat laggers, but not good egg layin hens! yeah. maybe that ll do it. Ive had no coons visiting, not since they clawed up the door in frustration at not being able to get some Mck=Chicken.
and theres the kittys. they are nearly grown now, I guess they are like...teenagers. but w/o the attitude. Cats have never been my favorite thing, I think they are just aliens from antoher world that were naughty, and got banished to earth as cats. thats why they have that im better then you attitude and refuse to learn tricks like a dog. But they have been entertaining....jumping and attacking. And didyou know they can fly? well. Ill elaborate on that another time.
I wish there was more to funny stuff of life to laugh at during the day. Maybe there is, and I cant seem to notice it. hey at least the tractor has not caught on fire lately!

ugh

Jul 14, 2008

ugh

Current mood:chipper

well, its another exciting day in my life. theres nothing like being dumped twice in the same month! I must have a knack for it! These are the dog days of hot summer here in oklahoma. Im lucky to have picked up a little side job, that keeps me busy though... Im a "Drug Compliance Officer" for  an agency that monitors troubled drug offenders. Thats a fancy word for PEE boy... youve heard of the Water Boy? Well Im peeboy... thats like... the side kick of ...I dunno.. GatorAid man? Anyway  it will keep me busy as I want to be come nite time. I always hated the night time. Especially alone. I cant help but wonder what the rest of this exciting upbeat year can bring. oh and my favorite time of year is yet to come! Thats right.... winter time. The leaves fall off. You have to put out hay, and feed alot. you get to work on the "sexy tractor" alot. and the place turns brown, unless I plant winter wheat...which I cant afford to do this year. Then theres the holidays. oh thank God for those. If I didnt have a special day to be alone oh where oh where would I be? Ive always put up a tree and lights at Christmas time. I have no idea why. I guess its a carry over from when I was a kid. Cold and windy. Wet and ...did I say cold? with a tree that I forget to plug up. no presents. thats for real people. and caroling. they wont come to my house to sing, not since that time I stuck a gun barrel out the door. lol. Well it wasnt loaded! no sense of humor. Waht to you expect when you sing a freakin christmas song about good cheer at a trolls house? chocolate? And it goes on... new years day, and oh my. the big one.... Valentines Day! oh yeah. Im so looking forward to this roller coaster ride into the future of 08/09!!
I do too have a good attitude! ugh.

ugh

Jul 14, 2008

ugh

Current mood:chipper

well, its another exciting day in my life. theres nothing like being dumped twice in the same month! I must have a knack for it! These are the dog days of hot summer here in oklahoma. Im lucky to have picked up a little side job, that keeps me busy though... Im a "Drug Compliance Officer" for  an agency that monitors troubled drug offenders. Thats a fancy word for PEE boy... youve heard of the Water Boy? Well Im peeboy... thats like... the side kick of ...I dunno.. GatorAid man? Anyway  it will keep me busy as I want to be come nite time. I always hated the night time. Especially alone. I cant help but wonder what the rest of this exciting upbeat year can bring. oh and my favorite time of year is yet to come! Thats right.... winter time. The leaves fall off. You have to put out hay, and feed alot. you get to work on the "sexy tractor" alot. and the place turns brown, unless I plant winter wheat...which I cant afford to do this year. Then theres the holidays. oh thank God for those. If I didnt have a special day to be alone oh where oh where would I be? Ive always put up a tree and lights at Christmas time. I have no idea why. I guess its a carry over from when I was a kid. Cold and windy. Wet and ...did I say cold? with a tree that I forget to plug up. no presents. thats for real people. and caroling. they wont come to my house to sing, not since that time I stuck a gun barrel out the door. lol. Well it wasnt loaded! no sense of humor. Waht to you expect when you sing a freakin christmas song about good cheer at a trolls house? chocolate? And it goes on... new years day, and oh my. the big one.... Valentines Day! oh yeah. Im so looking forward to this roller coaster ride into the future of 08/09!!
I do too have a good attitude! ugh.

is my hen a dyke?

Jun 11, 2008

my hen is a dyke?

Chickens... boy they are alot of work. by the time you coon proof the stupid hen house, put shavings in the floor, and straw in the next boxes, your already give out. but then you go get chicks, that are garoonteeeeed to be hens when they grow up. I got twenty, but it seems there is something amiss. One of the hens starting crowing...or trying to. At first it was funny, but then I realized, my hen is a dyke. dang it. I mean after all they garooonnteeeed it to be a egg layin hen when she grew up. But she did something...i dont know what, and now she crows like a man. She even p;inches the other girls, and I know shes lookin at them like....well like a rooster would! They are all p;retty to look at, and this month I should get my first fresh eggs. from all but one. cuz dyke chickens dont lay eggs, and if they did, i dont think Id want to eat it.
I had just accepted this little twist of dykyness fate ....when i heard another hen crow. dang it. two dyke chickens. whats next? I wonder if a dyke chicken tastes like a regular rooster ? hmmmm?

When It Caught Fire

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• Jul 5, 2010

  18 gears vs 30 years

  I so remember the days of my  youth...when I rode a bike for so long. I sure got my moneys worth out of that old otasco Flying O 10 speed. Ive learned alot about todays bicycles, but thats another story. I decided ill get me a cheap bike, and get back into shape and I can feel the wind on myface again...the way I used to. Peaceful. I used to ride when I got home from highschool, until dark every day for years. I rode well into my 20's. Some of my best memories ...so. off I go. got the walmart $88 mt. bike... woo hoo.  I hopped on it as soon as I could and took off down my dirt road. Now its alittle over 2 miles to the paved road...and its 1/2 mile to the "T" down the road... and I made it about 100 yards. lol. not to the T. lol. i thought I was going to die. So I googled this situation, and made adjustments. Raised the seat.... discovered there are 18 gears, not 6.. lol. and tried again. ive made it to the T...but yesterday I decided my mission was to make the pavement 2 miles away. My AZZ hurted with every freakin bump. apparently my butt was made of tough leather when i was  younger... maybe it was due ot the butt whuppins I got withthe wooden board i used to get in HS... I dont know. Maybe I should google "hurtin bike butt"? I think  I will. I noticed my heart was workin harder then I remember it... and I sweated like a pig in church. wait. ..thats not right. a ...well. anyway... I did make the pavement. but was afraid to go much further on the smooth pavement. I was noticing every hill, and could just see myself calling 911 ...help I cant get this freakin bike home again. ..Ithink Im gonna die. (and my azz hurts) So..i turned around. I figuired although its uphill mostly on the way back,  and its been 30 yrs since I rode...hey this dang thing has 18 gears right? the one I rode back then was only 10 speeds. well I used every gear and wished I had more. But I did make it back w/o pushing or having a seiszure. I thought about 911 though. I took a pic when I got back, and i think you can see the hurt lines in myface. what do you think? any suggestions? my goal is to get back into riding shape. Im open to suggestions.
  
  
  8:59 AM

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• Jul 4, 2010

  life

  in times of uncertainty..(did I spell it right?) in times when you are nto sure of the future..and you wonder where you will wind up..? I think the whole country is close to this place. When you are confused, and bewildered about why this has happened...  I try to remember that you cannot recognize or appreciate the good tiems..when things are right and well within you and your world, if now and then, it does not come apart. Valleys are not forever. Neither are hilltops. and that is the ride we are on. Its the one thing you can count on....that things and tiems will change.
  
  There is only one thing that doesnt change....He is the same yesterday, today, and forever.
  
  During my latest trip to calif...some interesting things happened. the well house pump went out. that was a cool. $1000 bill. and on antoher day, recieved a call from a neighbor that one of my cows was in my front yard. it wasnt mine, it was another neighbors cow. apparently my yard/flowers are more attractive to the other cows. But all in all things are good. My g/f has cancer surgery soon...and I would appreciate your prayers for her.
  
  I am not sure about this life of mine. There was a time when I th ought it was so well planned out. I wonder how many of you thought that at this stage and age of your life, you would be where  you are at?  I guess I will delay putting new siding up on the house..for a bit. But I still have the goal of getting that new disc, so I can plant winter wheat the first of sept. its not to far away.we shall see what direction this ride Im on goes from now til then. Im holding on, my hat pulled down low, and Ill look it in the eye.... with a few more wrinkles and gray hairs...At least the truck or tractor has not caught on fire, like it once did. lol.
  10:46 AM

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• Apr 25, 2010

  The Sucky Date Blog

  this is where you describe  your sucky dates. now be descriptive... and tell what happend!  (put your font size at 14 or bigger..or it might be hard to read)
  
  which one kissed the worst? which one practically stripped naked on the first date w/o me, and should have kept her clothes ON! which one kissed horribly? Could they have a conversation? did they stink? were they just all that...(but only in their own dreams). 
  
  what did you like about them? anything at all? tell how your evening wore on... make this your Sucky Date Blog Spot....
  7:35 PM

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      ♥ Debbie ♥ OK D, I promised I would so here goes.... it's just so hard to choose which sucky date to blog about LOL  My first ever online date was probably still the worst.  It was before I had learned to develop a filter and assumed that men represented themselves as I did, meaning honestly.  He had small children and my son was still young then too so (first mistake, but actually my saving grace) we planned a "bring the kids along" date.  We met at a local park where the kids could play and we could talk.  As soon as I got out of the car this man came towards me with outstretched arms and a huge smile on his face.  A smile that didn't include teeth on half of his head.  (HELP)  He was wearing a terry cloth shirt (you remember them from the 70's - terry cloth with the bands around the chest, waist and at the arms?) Anyway his super cool terry cloth shirt was baby blue with white stripes.  He was wearing green khaki shorts, tube socks (again a throw back to highschool gym) with red stripes pulled all the way up to his knees and white loafers.  Oh my goodness how the heck can I get out of this??????  Right away I took my son to the bathroom and shame on me! used my son to get us out of there.  I told him I want you to slide down the slide and at the bottom kind of fall and start crying.  And no matter what I say or do, keep crying even if it is totally fake.  Being the awesome kid that he is..... he performed admirably.  My excuse to leave within 5 minutes??  "This is obviously upsetting him too much.  I know he didn't hurt himself, but the situation must be more than he is ready to accept.  I'm very sorry, but I need to get him out of here" .............Whew!!

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      I GOT MY ANGEL NOW !! YOU ARE SO FUNNY --

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• Feb 20, 2010

  Closed Caption Monster!

  ok.. i hate me. i do this ...i get so bored... sitting here watching tv...and I decided Id try something. silly me. ive managed to slim down to 2 remotes to work this stupid tv.. but I figured hey, wouldnt it be nice if when someone called, I could mute it, and still see the words. you know. ...and know how the movie ended... I can do this right? ugh. After all Im an accomplished man. College degree and all that. So i started looking at the longer remote..the one that controls the sound. Finally I see something called CC. and Sound options.. and this closed caption crap. Well i pushed something..and the words started coming across the screen. Trouble is, they keep coming! even when the sound is NOT muted! I finally got it to display in english. ugh. but I cant get it BACK to normal...or only when i mute it. ugh!! wheres a teenager when you need one? I should be able to do this ..im not 50 yet! you only lose your electronic talents, and start sitting on your balls when your 50 dammit! I should have one more good  year! Maybe Ill shoot this one...that always took care of my problems in the past... i been needin one of those flat screen things anyway. Well im gonna let the CC (i thought it was CC rider...not!)  button cool down...then try it again. stupid words are in the way!! ugh!!!
  11:00 PM

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      ♥ Debbie ♥ Good luck with that D!  As far as I know there is no way possible to only have cc when muted.... its either there always or never.  Maybe just remember where the button is and how to use it, then activate it when you are on the phone?  Or a better solution get a DVR, then you can pause and rewind live TV!

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• Feb 20, 2010

  Dear Valentine

  Take My Hand and walk with me, From where we are to where we will be. Love is a mystery.
  
  We'll learn what life is as we go-- no map. no answers. All I know is this: I love you so.
  
  All my love on Valentines Day and every day.
  12:18 AM

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• Jan 31, 2010

  some days suck.

  some days just suck ya know? im not complaining...its just..I wish i could see them coming. an older couple that I have known a long time died yesteerday. their house blew up... a gas leak.. and he is still alive. he would be better off dead i think.  the snow and ice I have dealt with fairly well. You always think you are more prepared then you really are though... i lit the candles. and two indoor lanterns. i had plenty of light. but my one flashlight..rechargeable.. went dead way to soon. good thing there was antoher one in the garage. and when I fnally decided to fire up the generator..i couldnt find the can of starter fluid. ugh. I finally did find it, but the nozzle was gone. so i tried to use my fingernail to get in to squirt. then the rope broke. ugh. so i decided to go to town...after alli could get some gas, coffee. whatever.
  on the way back... i passed one of those snow plows. you kow the blade was sitcking out inthe shoulder...then passed my turn off. i pulled over thinking Ill make a U turn...then the plow truck was coming...coming to fast. I was afraid it would hit me...so I made my u turn. that s when I realized that the truck does not turn tight AT ALL... when in 4wd. ugh. i did not make it back on the road..but I did go thru the bar ditch..it was 2 feet of snow...and no fences. so..I decided to floorboard it...or be stuck. i kept gong..and going... until finally i got to a road. I was back on the road I had missed. it could have been worse. and Im not even going to discuss relationship troubles. ugh. all on this same day..

  well sparkys alive. im only missing one cat and one cow. my place has not burned down..and i am not still alive after being burned up. now that would be a bad day.
  
  its just another day in oklahoma...
  12:06 AM

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      tammy it was hard on alot of people. i went to help a friend for 3days. i cooked and cleaned by candle light, and help feed and water the bulls. my girls learned a good lesson in hardship. we bonded. so all in all i guess it was a good experience. sorry about the couple. (and your cat and cow.)

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• Jan 8, 2010

  winter wonderland

  what a winter so far. i predict at least one more snow storm in feb too. a white out on christmas eve... i think i can still hear bing crosby singin some stupid song.... about a white christmas. im chopping ice on the pond so the cows can drink. and why must they wait til its 5 deg to have a new born calf? no babies lost yet.  a slight miscalculation means im on my last bale of hay... and i need more quickly! but ill find some..these handy dandy windows i got are working well with this wood burnin stove. it feels like grampas house...so hot you have to freakin hang your head out the window...(that tilts for ya.. the window that is..) just to suck in some fresh cold air.  at 90 deg...inside...it feels like yoru skin is sweating and sliding off of your body...and your new leather recliner..is...well. lets not go there.
  someday Ill learn how many logs NOT to put on the fire...the kitties are not frozen...  yet.
  
  I wonder who ordered up all this cold stuff? i havent fallen yet. not yet. only one water leak, and theres a frozen cow in the ice ..that used to be the pond. ill go cut some meat off her back side tomrrow.i can cook it on my woodburnin stove. nothing too funny going on..i havne tdone anything toooooo stupid lately. but im over due. Me and sparkys still alive....and doing ok. happy new year everybody!
  6:48 PM

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• Dec 13, 2009

  Merry Christmas yall!

  i have a g/f that had this great idea. shes learned to do short phone videos (no wise cracks! lol) and decided we shall do daily songs to each other..until Christmas. ive roasted my nuts over the fire (if you dont know the words you have ot make them up), ive caught Sammy kissin Santa Claus, sang yingle yells yingle yells.., and had a blue chirstmas w/o you. but do you know how many days it is from dec 1 to christmas? thats right.. 25 songs. now its getting challenging....and the music on on the satilite radio... and old movies sing them on the turner classic movie channel. ok so maybe I should try a diff channel and new tastes.
  
  the new hand made amish stove is also roasting my chest n nuts out of this house! i have to learn to handle the temp of it... im like one of those little old men. 14 deg outside. and 88 deg inside! with the windows (which are new and im still paying for) are OPEN...  but at least I havent burned the house down.
  
  its a sentimental time...and the weather is cold one day, and hot another. (68 today) Sparky is good, and im semi busy with indoor projects trying to ManUp my mancave. now to finish filling the girls stockings. okok i know they are grown. but i have a great time pretnding they are still kids, an d putting the stupidest things I can find in them...with the envelope of money which they really want....inside. besides candy, i need to find other stuff. like a plastic tiarra...so they can pose with pictures as princesses. nothing for a 22 yr old huh? She graduated from college yesterday. now for the 18 yr old.
  
  I have wood to cut, and things to do. my little house in the ....boondocks....is starting to look better. Ive met some old friends online....after many years...(except wendy!) and it was nice to finally see them in person. And I still believe in old romance, mistletoe,  and "true love" are you sick yet? i think I am. 
  
  so. on Christmas day... the girls will be away with their mom...and Ill be "living the dream" here... me and sparky.  Its not as bad as it sounds... in fact its ok. Thats how it is here ...this country christmas 2009.
  
  1:15 PM

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• Oct 30, 2009

  the new ekg.

  I remember watchin dad as I grew up.... getting these little wires hooked up to him.. they called it an EKG. those were the old days... at the ER ...it seemed tobe an all day experience.  now years later... things have changed so much.
  
  its a quicky now.  you go in, and poof. some nurse (she wasnt bad lookin!) unsnaps your shirt...lays you down... and starts putting these little sticky snapy thingys on you to hook u the wires. then she says.. undo your pants...i have to put two on your hip bone. I dont remember that back in the ER...but ok. now it was drafty. but they went poof...and presto. it was done. they said the squiggly lines were all normal. i think the nurse was cravin me, yeah...cuz she made me take all the stickyh things off myself!! what kind of service is that? two days later I found one still stuck to me! i guess I missed one...
  
  Ill probably have to make payments on those squiggly lines that took about 30 secs to do.. after insurance is done! ugh. id say each little squiggly line cost me about ten bucks.
  
  I asked em to tighten the bolts in my neck but they just looked at me funny. they also said they didnt do fangs, or claws...but scheduled a stress test. that should be interesting. I can see myself now... shoes, sweats, a treadmill, and me running like the 6 mill dollar man.  "hes up to 60 mph!".

  at least i got some sample viagras from him! yeah.
  8:34 AM

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      tammy i think viagra was the best thing invented!! Lol. us woman hit our prime at 40. now you guys can keep up with us. Ha!!

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      I GOT MY ANGEL NOW !!

      HMMM JUST SAMPLES -LOLOL
      BETTER NOT TAKE THOSE THE DAY OF YOUR STRESS TEST!!!

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• Sep 28, 2009

  the green mile

  The night is quiet, and the window by my bed is crystal clear. the moon is half, and the steel blue colored clouds stretch in rippled waves across the night sky. a pale reflection of moon light is spread around as it peeks in between the clouds, and make little silver linings on each rippled band of clouds. the wind is breezy... and blows myhair.. the trees seem to be alive with the sounds of frogs and locusts singing...
  
  this night is like all the others. quiet. and alone. I wonder many things on nights such as these. Each day my life is alittle shorter. I stumble through week to week... seeking the answers to questions i may never solve. I realize now... that this journey is mine. And there will be no one to go with me through it. It makes me consider what the total results of my presence on earth has been thus far? If I disappeared..would the locusts or frogs know it? Would there be a space where I once existed even as big as small space between those clouds.. 
  
  each day the sun rises... and today I saw 2 butterflies... my quest may continue and be unresolved... but it is mine all the same. So until the last day, I will keep on going. This is my journey. Living with my failures, living with what I almost had, trying to enjoy what I wind up with. This ... is my green mile....
  
  you cant travel it as much as you can feel it. can you feel it?
  2:29 PM

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      tammy after reading the four agreements i try everyday just to do my best and then i have no regrets. its a must read. i love reading your blogs.

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      Elitha Myers Unfortunately I can. I feel it everyday, but mostly at night and on the weekends. how did I get here? How do  escape? What is the point?

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      I GOT MY ANGEL NOW !! WOW I CAN SEE YOU BY THAT WINDOW --LOOKING OUT INTO YOUR PEACEFUL SURROUNDINGS

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• Aug 23, 2009

  the shower door install

  well the time finally arrived.... that old door was leaking leaking.. so i did it. first i tore the old one down... it took me a bit to figure how it came off. lol. i realized it was just kinda stuck...and the trim work had pieces that fit inside of each other...so i couldnt see the screws ... then the new item.
  
  directions. boy. some lame drunk drew the pictues of the instruction books shower door.  you could tell which way it was opening... you wouldn t think this was important..but the directions said... be sure and install the pivot plate  here..and the strike plate there.. well. ya cant tell...by looking. so ..i figured... pivot..tha tmust be the side with hinges right? and strike..the side that the door shuts up against. ok. now. the bottom thingy. does it go this way or that way. i put it in 3 times. ..thats my usuall number of times before i figure it out. lol. now it said... before you put this in... measure from point A to  the handle on the strike plate..provided you knwowhat that is... and subtract 8/16's of an inch from that.. and..
  
  i forgot to tell you i cant read a measuring tape. something about being too brilliant to ever learn..or some other problem... i got the simple measurements down... but just never mastered a tape measure. so. i eye balled it. im a good eye baller...
  
  well. its up. the door shuts. i caulked the crap out of it. now. for this morning smoke test.. or rather... water test.... to see if it leaks...
  
  so in spite of the pivot plates, shock plates, and that pesky measuring requirement.. i got th stupid thing up. I wonder if that bathroom leans alittle? cuz the door...well. its ... slanted? hey. as long as it shuts and dont leak right?
  
  wish me luck.
  8:09 AM

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• Aug 13, 2009

  big and shiny it is...

  I knew it would be pretty..and the big shiny stainless steel icebox would match my other appliances too. Finally...i can give the old ice box to someone that needs it bad. it is nice.. and has crushed ice and... ut oh. NO water line.. never needed one. but the day before the arrival of the big pretty icebox., i decided to try it...install a water line myself. I knew id have to crawl under the house... I got my friend lavoise to come over and be my helper.. and I carefully got all my tools together. I know me...and I tend to have to redo stuff when I do projects, and I knew being under the house..would suck.
  
  I eyeballed the crawlspace... and began slithering thru. When I saw how little the spaces were between the damp ground, and the rafters... thats when I said..."houston.. we have a problem".. but I was on a mission. So...i cralwed. dragging my trusty power drill with me. smart as I am, I was gonna drill UP... not down..that way I wouldnt hit another waterline! I crawled until I finally got there...and realized..I had forgotten the copper water line. ugh. After crying, kicking, and bumping my head on soemthing... i yelled for help. I hate doing that. Luckily..my helpers little boy...bravely scampered under the house with the waterline in tow... boyhe got around under there way better then I did. We stretched the line... and now was the time to drill UP... the hole goes under the drawer... of the bottom cabinet...next to the the fridge... and wouldnt you knw it... i have TWO extra holes...outside the cabinet....right thru the carpet...(I always have to do it 3 times). I thought man... no wonder you cant get a plummer to do this crap. He cant get down here, and its too freakin hard.. ThenI got stuck. I swear Im not that big. But I was. that when I changed frequencies from Houston to LORD? getme OUT! and I did... in a bit... lets not talk about the ropes and sirens...popcorn, and other activities like the national gaurd and firedepartment...
  
  But finally. There it is. Big shiny. the first time I turned the water on..it leaked like a sift. (what IS a sift??)  but I got it done. ill give it the 24 hour watch for leaks... and hope that tomrrow, ill have ice! and cold water in the door! yeah!
  
  now...for the new shower door I have to install. that ll be another story. wheres my drill?
  2:42 PM

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• Aug 6, 2009

  motorcycle blues

  well I did it. I sold my cycle. just today. sigh. funny how you dont utilize or appreciate somethign when you have, but when you feel the loss of it, then you miss it. lol. of course I know I am better off w/o it. no more zipping around at 90 mph.  and my kids are going to be glad that I sold it too....
  
  im not sure why i felt the need to blog it though...sigh. yee hawww. no more payments! but for now... ive the the blues...the I dont have a cycle blues...sniff. just pictures!
  1:54 PM

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• Aug 1, 2009

  VIRGIN windows..OMG....

  ok so I had this great plan...i cant seem to measure a window twice and get the same results, so I decided to have handy dandy home depot come out and give me the free estimate. ( I was just gonna get the measurements and do it myself you see) dont do that. the handy dandy man came. he had a great sales pitch. demo windows, and the little cut out versions of what your piece of crap window you now have looks like in the inside (of the frame)..and what this high tech piece of art looks like on the inside... but remember...this is not a purchase...this is an investment. right? he said so. he said alot of really catchy informative stuff. you know...the rq / ra insulatived reflective number being below 2.3 and all that stuff. very good to know... after all. its EIGHT freakin damn THOUSAND dollars of windows. (the freakin damn part was custom and therefore a slightly extra cost..but well worth it!) AND... these were not regular windows... no sir reee..
  
  let me explain...you see the regular windows you see at the home depot store...that tilt and all that. are NOT these special windows. THESE windows were like ...first designed for famous people. ..so being close to famous..(just undiscovered) im thinkin yeah. my windows... the guy said..the store windows would be the little league team , and THESE windows would be the world series winner team... see? THESE windows tilt and swivel... they have a life time this and that garantee...and you cant get windows made out of airplane stuff. I tried to bend the frames, you just cant do it. and the screens...they are especially distasteful to bugs. I tasted one. they suck. AND a life time warranty too... and HEY!!! he showed me how  you just takeem out of the frames.. poof. they clean them selves! thats right! self cleaning freakindamn windows. with life time shit on em. now what do you think? huh? huh? all yo do is runnum under water and putem back in..and wipem down. poof. they all cleaned up!!
  
  oh and the best part. they are made out of VIRGIN vynyl... thats right. aint that sexy? I think that means they are beter then sex. who needs a woman? I got high protein bars, self cleanin sexed up windows, and a dog that I am sure can learn to vacumn! heck he barks at it now! thats just two paws from vacumin! so all i have to do is pay for the whole freakin damn thing...... and presto. im good to go.
  
  i tell you what. im a freakin rocket scientist. oh!!! AND i ordered a NEW icebox... ( i found out they call em refridgerators now) AND it has that water thing in the door and all. but that s a whole nother blog...just you wait...
  7:21 PM

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• Jul 28, 2009

  What I learned this year...

  its half way into the year of 2009. the year of 2008 was the best year of my life, but I have to pause about this time of year, to evaluate what things i have learned this year.
  
  that some blogs are funny, some are serious. funny ones are appreciated more.
  how to install a dishwasher w/o flooding the floor.
  how to install a overhead microwave/venthood w/o burning ME up...or hte house.
  how to love a dog. How to wait on things I cant see, w/o going crazy...ok...crazier.
  To enjoy good times, as they just do not last...except as a memory in your heart.
  That Elvis really has left the building...
  to love with all my heart, body, and soul. To give up something because i love it enough to let it go.
  How to make a carport completely disappear.
  That chocolate comes in high protein bars...
  that some people just choose to live in their fear...
  that being beautiful on the outside is just as important as being beautiful on the inside. (it is too!)
  that someday over the rain bow.... is still a dream... that may never come true.
  that God works very slowly when it comes to hard heads.... maybe so itll soak in or something. ugh.
  that hitting a tractor wheel with yoru fist because it is stuck will break your hand.
  that I am tougher then I thought I was..i mean... just as tough as I knew I was. yeah.
  that the truck runs better on ice when its in 4wd.
  that you can arrest 5 people in one night.
  that even when those you love are gone, they are not really gone. not in Sundances World anyway..
  that it still can be a 70 deg difference in the weather in oklahoma in a 24 hour period.
  that there might be one person that is more stubborn then I am.
  that cats really are naughty aliens from another world that were banned as punishment to earth... for the rest of their lives. (field goal!)
  that running is not the answer...
  
  
  im looking forward to the list of things I have yet to learn the rest of this year.
  2:18 PM

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• Jul 14, 2009

  Elvis has left the building

  ok i did it. finally i did it. i forgot ONE time to shut the stupid door to the hen h ouse, and now Elvis has indeed left the building.... in a coons mouth. yep. EP is dead. I already miss his crowing. he would run right up to the back door, and start crowing while he ate the cats food. ugh.
  
  Then the AC to the police car went out...thats $445.16 .. then not least but last... I somehow for the first time in my life, lost cash. ugh. about $160 must of fell out of my pockets of my shorts. so. what a day. momma said thered be days like this..days like this... lol.
  
  ok. well. i have cool air now. i have money...2 bucks. lol. and I have nothing to have to be home by dark for now ... just locke up th ehen house and forget it. no more hens for awhile!
  
  I still have my fav cat. If I can have a cat that I can call a favorite that is. Blackie is still around. all the rest of my 8 cats are gone/dead or beamed up by Elvis i guess. maybe they didnt like dogfood. sparkys still here. good thing he dont have thumbs, or hed be driving the new ac car down the road to better dog food.
  
  so when all these crappy things happen... remember to repeat the following phrase..:
  
  scooby scooby do!!  now... you cant really treat crappy days seriously if your reciting scooby phrases can you? I dont think so.  oh well. the week is half over, and its gonna cool down to the mid 90s here...
  thats how it is... here in oklahoma today.
  scooby scooby dooo!
  10:46 PM

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• Jul 2, 2009

  Me and the Bachelors

  well at first glance, this internet dating idea sounded so good. just a great idea. But well.. its not so much I think. Y ou sit down, and go thru a big catalog, and look at this one and that one... too fat, too ugly...to fat and to ugly.... and then you feel shallow. lol. but hey, thats what the pictures are for right? If you were car shoppin youd not pick a car that didnt suit you wo uld you? I dont want that station wagon, but boy, its got a great radio in it! NOT.
  
  ok so i message a few. This one smokes dope..just an occassional one mind you... and that one has 15 kids, this one smokes...and that one is just plain crazy nuts. ugh. Another ones picture did not reflect who she really was or looked like. it was 40 lbs ago, and im thinking it might be her sister anyway. She says.."well I havent changed that much anyway" ugh. 
  
  And then theres that first meeting. geesh. you know in 15 seconds... that its a no. And once in a while it takes a 2nd date... to know. Meanwhile me and sparky mow the yard. well. I do. sparky just continues being the dog around the house. Elvis the rooster is all thats left now. The coons got to them all one night...so now its just us bachelors. At least the cat s havin some action, she had kittens!
  
  So I talk to God and wonder what weird mysterious plan He has... and how it will be to turn 50 and still live in this desolate place alone. I guess He has something going on up there, that has disallowed the "big Picture". surely its not ME. Im so flexible, and ... whats the opposite of hard headed?.....
  
  I wonder how everyone else is doin ? if you ever have similar thoughts? Myabe your rooster has LOTS of hens... lol. Maybe you like being alone? I wonder how that works. aint got it figured out yet. But Im all over that. Me and the bachelors...go Elvis, go Sparky, go me.
  7:04 AM

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      Ariel Smith Want me to find you a Canadian Princess? hehehe
      
      Being alone isn't so bad, once you figure that out, then maybe you'll find a decent chick.  Look on the bright side, you could have a gold digging yadda yadda on your arm.

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      Ronda McDaniels Im going to be nice because I have the same problem.  Plus I am the too ugly too fat chick. lol
      All I can say is at least all of them havent been in Africa asking you for money.  Or have they?
      Anyway God has a plan.  For you and for me too.  We just have to be patient.  I think that last statement was more for me than for you.  People  always say(1) I'm looking in the wrong place.
      (2)I love this one, that I'm too picky.  Then I look around and think well where did you find that ugly jerk that your with so I will be sure to not look there but I will be pickier than you were.
      It actually does me good to know that someone else feels like I do. Sorry you are lonely but look at the brightside you dont have to share your toys.

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      ♥ Debbie ♥ I'd like to see you make me :P
      You know I only say it because I care!!

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      Sundance Kid oh shut up. *s*

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      ♥ Debbie ♥ Awww D, I'm sorry you are hurtin' still, again, whatever it might be.  I think I've tried telling you this before, but maybe if I try again it will sink in this time.  You've got to get happy with yourself before you can be happy with someone else.  Quit 'trying' to make love happen.  Quit feeling sorry for yourself and rejoice in all the wonderful things you have.  Your health, your family, your little piece of heaven (that seems like a prison, but isn't if you would only open your eyes to it), your own thriving business, Sparky and Elvis.  Try being content and thankful of your gifts.  Try being open to new things, rather than stuck.  And try to quit being so.... what's the opposite of flexible??  Yeah, that word! ;-)

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• Jun 17, 2009

  A new phase of life

  this morning i made the time to sit on the back step, and sip my cup of coffee. no interuptions.. i noticed the way the sun rising relfected off of the clouds in the south. It was sure beautiful. I wonder how many times I just did not notice this? I wonder how many sights such as this, that I just missed? And then I wonder what else am I missing? maybe I just wonder too much. lol.
  
  I have been single for 6 years now. Im getting older. I am sure this is something someone reading this might identify with. Its a phase of my life I did not intend to enter alone. But I guess I will be alone..and I cannot afford to make more plans for "if" or "when" she comes to be with me in my life... Sound familar? So I will try hard to adjust to the thought and mindset of living my life alone, and being content with it. I do not think I will ever be happy wiht it. But content doesnt sound all so bad at this point.
  
  So. step one... focus on the blessings. on the things that bring me peace and joy. sparky...baby calves....sunsets...coffee on the back step..instead of the problems in front of me which seem neverending. step two: get busier... its summertime. get out side. enjoy th eblue sky. Winter will come soon enough. and lastly... talk to God alot. Somehow acknowledging that He knows what im doing and where Im at helps me to do it more contentedly. (is that a word?)
  
  Ive made my pleas. ive made my requests. Now I will look at my place in life, and be proud of who and what Ive stood for, and continue on. but without the expectation of a mate. aww who needs a mate anyway right? zone bars are tasting pretty good. shed probably wanna drive my tractor anyway.... and id have to share my toys.
  
  so off.... to the next phase of life.... with a new mindset.
  10:28 AM

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• Apr 8, 2009

  Sparkys Hair Dog Clone

  WEll today was the last training day, so I should be good for the year. I thought I d get me anice new log splitter, but i found out that I cannot use my tractors current hydrolic hook up.... and by the timeI put antoher one on there, Id be better off to just buy one wiht a motor on it. So...I priced them. whew. they are HIGH.
  so this sparky the dog thing.... its going pretty well. I think this dog might be smarter then some people I know. I wonder if he can draw a check? hmmm. There is a problem though.... its the hair. geesh. i can comb him, and comb him, and get no hair. but if I pet him with my hand, the hair jumps on me..and tries to overtake me! its like... attack of the sparky hair... so I thought hell. I can make me a whole nother dog with the hair I pet off this one! so I did! yep. a life size sparky replica! course the hair was..well. not right. its hard to get it all to go the same way, like God did it on sparky. I wonder how many dogs He made before he got the hair to all run the same way? Anyway.... the first time "HairSparky" barked I swatted him and said no...and well. killed him! now theres just a mess of freakin hair. ruin a good vacum cleaner. surely theres something I can do with all of it..besides throw it out. Myabe i could sell it as.... BigFoot hair on ebay or soemthing...  Until then, Ill just have to get a better comb. maybe I can teach sparks to comb him self. hey he can lick his own ass. why shouldnt he be able to comb himself? At least he looks good in a red bandana.
  8:14 PM

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• Mar 12, 2009

  stupid stuff I do

  ok.. I have done it again... caught myself doing something so stupid, that I had to laugh about it later. Come on now... I know there are others out there that have done similar things... unless I am really an Alien living among an outside species! I was talking to my friend jenner... and had recently gotten a coffee maker Id loaned to her back. But I coujldnt find the cord! I told her...Jenner... the cord is gone..where did you put it? you lost it? where is it? she kept saying... its in the back, its in the back. WEll?? I looked at the back. not there. Then she used the words..."in the cord keeper"... now jenner is from wisconsin, and they just almost speak a different language..(and I think IM the alien?) so I asked..what the hell is a cord keeper? And she then explained there is a (secret hidden) compartment in the back that the cord is stored in. duh. SO.... today, and I just happened to be talking to jenner again.... I noticed that I needed to resize the picture on the tv. I needed the right remote. Now I have had this same tv system for 5 years... so I started looking for this 4th remote. you know...one for DISH, one for this one for that... I looked all over. Under the couch, in the kitchen... and of course jen gets the play by play description.. Where the hell is tha t 4th remote? Then I realized... ugh. I dont have 4 remotes. I have 3 remotes. thats why I couldnt find it! it dont exist!! DUMASS! ugh. sure enough on the 3rd remote.... i found the resize the picture button.. More laughter from jenner.  ok maybe this is one of those days where im not on all 8 cylinders again.... hmmm
  9:56 AM

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      Elitha Myers haha Welcome to my world! :)

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      ♥ Debbie ♥ ONE of those days? Dwayne darlin' seems to be MOST of your days are on one cylinder.
      
      
      
      
      I don't think you are secretly an alien, I think you are BLONDE! Haha! I can get away with that since I am too! ;-)

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• Mar 8, 2009

  A Special Walk..

  Sometimes you see with eyes of your own, and sometimes.. you see with another view. And things are not as they seem after all. You walk thru the woods, and you see the awesomeness of nature.. and the beauty of the skies, the colors of the sunset. You swear  you hear the sounds of past life, playing along the creek you now walk. You speak to God but there is silence. all you hear is the wind...And you wonder what tomorrow will bring. Will you take the time to notice?
  A calf runs...he feels so free and young. He feels good. He creeps closer to you, and even licks  yoru fingers. but his mother walks slow and seems to groan with every step. My own steps falter just alittle... and I feel incomplete.
  How beautiful is the smile of young love...how tragic is the sadness of great loss..There is life, and there is death. and something in between. I wonder what will be said about my in between?
  I walk, and listen to the song of birds, I see with eyes that see my way. But I can see with more then eyes. I can hear with more then ears..and although this walk is sometimes like the old animal... I remember it is once ...every so often... as the run of the young calf.
   I remember a time....not so far past, when I could see with young eyes, with a young heart...And I yearn for the days of the rose colored glasses, to see what is joyful, to feel what is peaceful, and to be, for a moment in time, the last piece. Complete. 
  11:42 PM

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• Mar 3, 2009

  All 8 Cylinders

  You know your not clicking on all 8 cylinders...when:
  you find urself standing wet and naked, water turned off, and cant remember if you washed your hair...
  you cant say what youve eaten that day!
  you realize you havent shaved for a week..
  when you look in your empty icebox and think.. ive got enough..
  when you forget to comb your hair, and your already on your way to work!
  when you almost swallow the splenda package because you put the whole thing in your cup of coffee!
  when you have to dump splenda out of the coffee filter, when making coffee..(use the coffee son...)
  when you realize its noon, and you have not let the poor chickens out of their little house...
  when you "wake up" and find that your driving in the middle of the road instead of your side! (road hog)
  Ill add more when I think of them.. feel free to list some of your "all 8 cylinders" experiences!
  8:02 AM

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      ♥ ♥ Vaughan-n-Lois ♥ ♥ Funny, sounds like some of my poetry (a good bad day) on poetry.com.

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      shay wow...sounds like you need a good tune up !! lol

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• Feb 25, 2009

  bitch on a rope!

  today was such a nice day, i decided to go outside and take a walk. But everytime I moved wrong, my ribs hurt.  you see I was helpin a friend move something very heavy..(500 lbs) and it slipped and the corner caught me in the ribs. I think i cracked one... it even makes my back hurt. no deep breaths, no sneezing, and NO coughing! But a mild walk is ok. On the way back, I noticed a calf that was on top of the storm celler (OUTSIDE the fence). the little bitch. lol. it was almost dark or I coulda just shooed her in a gate, but it would take to long to shut gates, and unlock this one..and all that. so I cornered her inside the chicken run, and got a rope, and roped her. Thats when I remembered that Ihurt. lol. I did most of the dragging. And I didnt think about the pain much, until after I got the rope off her. Then I discovered I needed to breathe.. i couldnt... so I coughed. Remind me to just open the gates in the dark next time! Times like these need to be shared with someone!
  4:39 AM

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      ♥ ♥ Vaughan-n-Lois ♥ ♥ Sundance,
      
      I hope you're much better now.
      
      
      Lois

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      Elitha Myers OMG! Dwayne!! LOL I can just see you out there, seconds after dragging her wandering butt back in.. releasing her and then BAM!! No breath, profuse sweating and I'm sure some cussing here and there! LOL You poor thing!! So sorry to hear of your escapee and even more about your ribs! Yikes!! Get to a dr silly!! :) We have an opening at 330! LOL

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• Jan 24, 2009

  Mid Winter Blues

  Current mood:melancholy

  The day is sunny, and the sky is blue. The wind seems constant, and its very cold. Its one of those look warm, but freeze days. Some days this old house seems much emptier then it used to. Its these kinds of days that make me stop, and wonder. I and hate that, cuz wondering leads to thinking... and that seems to make my head hurt. Then first thing ya know, theres this burning smell, and smoke. Then ya hear those sirens. and firetrucks, but its only me... being "thoughtful".
  Its very dry in oklahoma. the 3rd driest year since 1929. I look around, and wonder why rain has not come yet. I see the 4 new calves ...they run and play.Isee the deer, and wild turkey crossing my place. I see the beautiful sunsets. I feel peace, but also disconnected. Sometimes I think I will just be alone forever, but I feel as though there is supposed to be someone else here. Its just a feeling. If I think about it too much, therell be firetrucks.
  then I remember, it is just that time of year. mid winter. cold. barren. thats when it seems the hardest. It makes a man wonder about his life, and what he has stood for, and where or how long, he has yet to go. About the few friends, if he has any at all....he has. I saw my daughters 6 days ago. They are very busy. I get a text message now and then. Im proud of them.
  I better put some bluegrass music on.... I hear sirens again.
  4:00 PM

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      ♥ ♥ Vaughan-n-Lois ♥ ♥ I saw my first deer last week outside of Davis since I was a child when my family visisted the mountains here, I always longed for Oklahoma, when all my friends back home wanted Hawaii and the more glamourous spots, I wanted my beloved dream spot of Oklahoma.

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      Sharon E Friend here!

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      deleted You do have friends and they love you!! I do anyway!! This too shall pass my friend!!

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• Dec 4, 2008

  Merry CHRISTmas!

  *Twas the month before Christmas*
  *When all through our land,*
  *Not a Christian was praying*
  *Nor taking a stand.*
  *The politically correct police had taken away,*
  *The reason for Christmas - no one could say.*
  *The children were told by their schools not to sing,*
  *About Shepherds and Wise Men and Angels and things.*
  *It might hurt people's feelings, the teachers would say*
  *December 25th is just a  " Holiday ".*
  *Yet the shoppers were ready with cash, checks and credit*
  *Pushing folks down to the floor just to get it!*
  *CDs from Madonna, an X BOX, an I-pod*
  *Something was changing, something quite odd! *
  *Retailers promoted Ramadan and Kwanzaa*
  *In hopes to sell books by Franken & Fonda.*
  *As Targets were hanging their trees upside down*
  *At Lowe's the word Christmas - was no where to be found.*
  *At K-Mart and Staples and Penny's and Sears*
  *You won't hear the word Christmas; it won't touch your ears.*
  *Inclusive, sensitive, Diversity*
  *Are words that were used to intimidate me.*
  *Now Daschle, Now Darden, Now Sharpton, Wolf Blitzen*
  *On Boxer, on Rather, on Kerry, on Clinton !*
  *At the top of the Senate, there arose such a clatter*
  *To eliminate Jesus, in all public matter.*
  *And we spoke not a word, as they took away our faith*
  * Forbidden to speak of salvation and grace*
  *The true Gift of Christmas was exchanged and discarded*
  *The reason for the season, stopped before it started.*
  *So as you celebrate "Winter Break" under your "Dream Tree"*
  *Sipping your Starbucks, listen to me.*
  *Choose your words carefully, choose what you say*
  *Shout MERRY CHRISTMAS, not Happy Holiday!*
  
  12:56 AM

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      ♥ ♥ Vaughan-n-Lois ♥ ♥ Very touching.

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• Nov 27, 2008

  Are you Smarter then a .... Carport?

  As most of you know, about a month ago, my pretty red tractor shelter just blew plum away. it wrapped itself around the well house...and in short, I took two fences down, and drug it away upside down.... into the pasture. After I rebuilt the fences,  took the side walls apart leaving only the metal support beams sticking up. I thought it was secure..
  I just came home..after the insurance guy finally showed up.... I took a little trip and was gone for about 4 days. It was a very nice 4 days. My youngest daughter watched the house, and fed the critters. When I got home, being a trained and observant investigator...kinda like that guy on that tv series...the mentalist... or sherlock freakin holmes...so I noticed that the carport roof was now on TOP of the barn. ugh. My daughter said well dad.... i  thought it had blown away... and looked out the door..."yep. its on top the barn. ". geesh.
  So I drug it off the barn... without too much damage to the barn and decided to take all the sheet metal off the top, as it landed right side up! One end was stickin way up in the air...about 15 feet, so I decided to just crawl up there on top and take all the sheet metal off that end at once... duh. Im such a rocket scientist. Of course that was all that held the thing together.and when i took th emetal off...it collapsed.
  Now I knew that when I heard the sound of crunching metal, and felt nothing but air beneath my feet.... that I might be in trouble...but I got lucky and missed the metal pile on the ground, and then my old ninja training kicked in as i deftly (is that a word?) rolled on the ground and jumped up with a flying side kick. yeah. ok 30 min later after I stopped crying, I drove my sorry ass to the house on the 4 wheeler.
  I looked at the situation, and decided to pack it in for the evening...maybe Ill take pictures and feed the suggested plan of action into the military err..i dont know...somewhere...for my next move... or maybe Ill just ummm... try it again. It wont be as high next time right? Wheres that extra pair of hands I been waitin on??
  and wheres my dang insurance check??
  
  
  
  1:07 AM

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      ♥ ♥ Vaughan-n-Lois ♥ ♥ Seek and ye shall find.

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      Sundance Kid lol. entertaining is a nice word... thanks for using that one! lol

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      Sharon E I think you would really be entertaining to watch! LOL

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• Nov 6, 2008

  Oklahoma wind...

  It only happens when you think things are going well.... and maybe your getting ahead. You start to think, how good things are, and how nice this Christmas will be.. and how your actually going to have some money maybe....saved!
  Then... the Oklahoma wind comes. oh heck it blows here all the time, but this time it really came. No tornado, no rain, just wind. And it blows your brand new carport completely away, and it lands on the wellhouse roof...(it leaked anyway). sigh.
  Okkkklahoma....(sing it with me!) Where the wind comes sweepin down the plain.... and the carports gone, and the roofs gone too, and the real storm isnt even here.... oooooo klahoma ....
  Well Ill put some pics up. Notice the excitement in the expression on my face. Im just freakin thrilled. It coulda been worse though, the nice truck parked under that carport was not touched, and neither was anything else. Maybe God didnt like that color.... or the stupid mexicans didnt put the anchors where I told them to. Thats my last piece of business with eagle carports!
  So im off on another quest, clean up and replace.... this time ...with concrete foundation....
  
  
  1:33 AM

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      ♥ ♥ Vaughan-n-Lois ♥ ♥ Second time around hopefully will be better than the first time it sounds like a better choice.

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• Oct 21, 2008

  Getting a life.....

  Have you ever noticed that if your around an animal much, you tend to mimick it some? Ive learned to crow ..not too bad either..... like my rooster Elvis. He thinks its alittle obnoxious I think. But Im getting better. (get a life?) So last night I got  home late, and the hens were already up...so I shut the door. Later in the night I wondered....what if there were a coon in there?  Id just find him and some dead hens the next morning.... and bang. So... about 6 am.... which is Elvis's wake up call time... I heard nothing. ten after..... nothing. I knew Elvis was dead.... so I took the gun and the flash light...down to the hen house. I peered thru the door. And there was that lazy Elvis... no dead hens, and no coon. Everyone was just sleepin late.
  So I crowed real loud, and about gave Elvis a heart attack! He stretched his neck out and cocked his head as he looked at me...like.."what the ..."? On the way back.... I heard a voice in my head.... maybe it was the spirit of Elvis? it said.."you are the man...but...GET A LIFE!"
  Some body slap me!
  
  2:32 PM

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      ♥ ♥ Vaughan-n-Lois ♥ ♥ Maybe Elvis has a point, Sweetie.

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• Oct 14, 2008

  bulls and people.

  Bulls and people. ugh. Ever notice the similarities? I have a bull, his name is Freddy Hopper. Dont ask me why that s his name. I dont know. He just felt like a Freddy Hopper, so he is. Well freddy was always laid back and a good bull. But the other day he jumped the fence. Then he got his butt whupped good by the neighbors bull....and he cut his foot up. well he came back...and I let him in the gate. He was on "the other side of the fence".... looking for strange meat. Sound familar? He has plenty of lil women on this side..but nooooo. He got his whanger hurt too when he jumped. serves him right.
  Well i put ol freddy in the sick pen, and was aimin to givem a shot, and watch him close. But soon as I went to the house, he pushes the gate open. Id of wired it shut, but I didnt know hed do that. So off he goes. Now hes hidin out on the north side of the property, hopin that other bull dont come whup his sorry ass again. Well he laid down...and I snuk up there and talkedto h im, and poked on him abit...and he didnt seem to care. So I think hmmmmm. (it hurts when I think but I do it anyway sometimes) maybe I can give ol freddy a shot...with him layin there. Now givin a bull a shot that is not in a headgate is not really a good idea. I knew this....but I wanted to give him one anyway. So I loaded 2 sryinges... just iin case he was real nice and let me poke him twice.... and went back on the 4 wheeler with a rubber dish and some feed. but he was standin up !
  WEll I did have the syringes loaded.... soo.... now no one knew where I was at, but I did have my cell... so I decided to call someone and letem know where I was in case they went to lookin for my body! Turns out that freddy wasnt THAT sick....and I didnt get to give him a shot, but wasnt for the lack of tryin. Maybe I can get him to come to the house somehow...or Ill try again...soon... if he dont up and die.
  So... dont it remind you of a man..(not me of course!) that goes lookin...for something.... and when you try to help him..(women do it too!) they act out on you... no help! I wanna get sicker. and why? cuz hes a bull...*snort snort paw paw* and thats how it is with bulls and.... people...
  *note to self...dont poke a bull with a needle unless hes caught good*
  the dumass. (the bull not me!)
  
  
  
  11:24 PM

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      ♥ ♥ Vaughan-n-Lois ♥ ♥ The moral of the story is stay away from strange meat or be satisfied with your own meat.

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• Sep 16, 2008

  Can a "kitchen retard" draw a check?

  you know these people that draw these monthly checks? you knwo the ones that are smarter then me, and dont have to work, cuz they are "disabled"? well.. Im a kitchen retard. I wonder if I could draw a check on that? I made an executive decision, thats right. I put my foot down. and I decided that I was gonna make me some chocolate chip cookies. This was awhile back, but I figured, I dont need some woman to take care of me! Ill just do the recipie on the back of the chip sack. sounds easy. ok cool. So.. I get all the stuff out... and thats when I discovered what how disabled I am in the kitchen. I had long ago decided that Id keep the flour and sugar in these big glass jars, that used to be used for big big pickle jars! then there would be no bugs or problems! Im so smart. and when I tried to get the flour out... uh, the measureing scoop would not fit into the jar. that meant I had to use a smaller one, but that is not the same size as the size the recipie called for! so I decidded to use the smaller one, and then pack it in the bigger one! then on the way OUT of the jar with the flour, it got caught.... (never jerk a measuring cup wiht flour in it).. and poof. It looked like a bomb went off. I looked like Casper.... and flour was everywhere. I did get the cookies made, but for some reason they were not as good. And the mess was...well. a mess. Why doesnt hte recipies have a video or at least some pictures? or maybe some special packaging with special instructions for us special people?
  
  
  
  10:53 PM

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      ♥ ♥ Vaughan-n-Lois ♥ ♥ Maybe you should reconsider some things, I'll let you figure that one out.

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• Sep 16, 2008

  Home Health Care... I need some.

  what do you do when your bad day ....is a bad day at home? Ill have to ask some retired folks... I mean..Im already home. where do I go for relief? Im up to a challenge, well most the time...  but some days I just dont click on all 8 cylinders.
  it all started this morning when I went to let the chickens out. I discovered that I left the hen house open, and wouldnt you know it, this was the night the coons decided to check to see if I was serving McChicken. I was. I lost two hens. poor girls. I told the rest of em to start workin double time, or they were next.  ok not the end of the world. So...I decided to to to town, and the main goal was to hit walmart, aned get some needed items. I of course forgot that too, and thus the cats are hungry today. I wonder what else I have forgotten? and who needs bread?
  so ... I decided to move the air compressor to the new shop. and thats when I found the BIG tire on the creature (jd 4020) flat. ugh. Upon further inspection i discovered that the valve stem was bad... and so no problem . I just unscrewed it so I could replace it. That s when I found out that someone (previous owner) put prestone in the tires. Its surprisign how much can squirt out in your face and down your arms in just a nano second. you know prestone has a distinct taste. of course its highly posionous. and sticky. yes its sticky. And I had no vavle stem to replace it with. so... I decided I better use that heavy duty high jack to lift up alittle, and relieve the weight on that tractor tube. maybe I could save that. I remember once...being knocked out by the bar when I failed to push it all the way down before it "clicked". so I was careful! So I jacked it up, and the bottom of the jack went thru the first layer of rock under the carport, and sunk down into the ground out of sight. great. I dug tha tout and put a double 2/4 under that. course it broke in half. but I did relieve some pressure. so I took a shower, and now im hungry. seems someone forgot to get groceries.
  I hate it when criss leaves me for about 30,000 days.... I need a sitter!
  I think Ill just stay home tonight and watch tv ...wheres my chocolate chips...
  
  10:30 PM

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• Aug 1, 2008

  life on the ranch

  Thank God for OFF.

  Well Im sitting here at a stupid computer, after 2 cups of coffee, staring out the window viewing what I consider to be a very peaceful setting. I feel kinda like being on vacation, and have not quite gotten used to not getting up and going to work everyday to some office job. But Im getting there!
  the mexicans are out there building my shop now, and i just know they are gonna try to not do it like I want it done, and steal my ladder! But i am all over that, Ill tell you that. Maybe when it is done, it will actually not leak, and not blow down, and be a good thing.
  Im thinking its time to spray the pastures, but the cost of desiel is ...well.... maybe I wont spray it. the cows dont know that the grass is more expensive for them to eat ..so...I guess I shouldnt fret too much.  my 6 calves dont have a clue how good they have it either. lol. I think one of em is a retard though. I didnt know that animals could be so different from each other... some are smart, some are nervous, etc. This one calf, hes a retard. He figured out a way to get through a fence, then didnt have enough sense to walk thru an open gate. oh no no, hed rather watch me sweat my ass off in shorts and sandels thru the deep grass and chiggers shooing him up and down the fence line, until he finally goes in a little hole down in the ditch, and gets back across. I patched that sucker so he wont do that again. Maybe he was just havin some entertainment with me hmmmm...
  I wonder who was the retard from his perspective? hmmmm.
  Thank God for OFF.
  
  
  8:37 AM

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• Jul 14, 2008

  the funny stuff of life

  have you ever looked at a cloud and saw Under Dog? or... a crocodile? Or found yourself laughing alone, at ... a chicken? those stupid hens. I finally got 2 eggs in one day! I guess that little talk I had with them is paying off. But there laggers!!! So ..Im going to have to maybe eat one this winter. maybe in front of the rest of em. and tell them... that I eat laggers, but not good egg layin hens! yeah. maybe that ll do it. Ive had no coons visiting, not since they clawed up the door in frustration at not being able to get some Mck=Chicken.
  and theres the kittys. they are nearly grown now, I guess they are like...teenagers. but w/o the attitude. Cats have never been my favorite thing, I think they are just aliens from antoher world that were naughty, and got banished to earth as cats. thats why they have that im better then you attitude and refuse to learn tricks like a dog. But they have been entertaining....jumping and attacking. And didyou know they can fly? well. Ill elaborate on that another time.
  I wish there was more to funny stuff of life to laugh at during the day. Maybe there is, and I cant seem to notice it. hey at least the tractor has not caught on fire lately!
  
  
  
  5:01 PM

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• Jul 14, 2008

  ugh

  Current mood:chipper

  well, its another exciting day in my life. theres nothing like being dumped twice in the same month! I must have a knack for it! These are the dog days of hot summer here in oklahoma. Im lucky to have picked up a little side job, that keeps me busy though... Im a "Drug Compliance Officer" for  an agency that monitors troubled drug offenders. Thats a fancy word for PEE boy... youve heard of the Water Boy? Well Im peeboy... thats like... the side kick of ...I dunno.. GatorAid man? Anyway  it will keep me busy as I want to be come nite time. I always hated the night time. Especially alone. I cant help but wonder what the rest of this exciting upbeat year can bring. oh and my favorite time of year is yet to come! Thats right.... winter time. The leaves fall off. You have to put out hay, and feed alot. you get to work on the "sexy tractor" alot. and the place turns brown, unless I plant winter wheat...which I cant afford to do this year. Then theres the holidays. oh thank God for those. If I didnt have a special day to be alone oh where oh where would I be? Ive always put up a tree and lights at Christmas time. I have no idea why. I guess its a carry over from when I was a kid. Cold and windy. Wet and ...did I say cold? with a tree that I forget to plug up. no presents. thats for real people. and caroling. they wont come to my house to sing, not since that time I stuck a gun barrel out the door. lol. Well it wasnt loaded! no sense of humor. Waht to you expect when you sing a freakin christmas song about good cheer at a trolls house? chocolate? And it goes on... new years day, and oh my. the big one.... Valentines Day! oh yeah. Im so looking forward to this roller coaster ride into the future of 08/09!!
  I do too have a good attitude! ugh.
  
  
  4:48 PM

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      ♥ ♥ Vaughan-n-Lois ♥ ♥ 2009 is up to you and it's what you make it ; ) .

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• Jul 2, 2008

  Life On the Ranch

  Current mood:amused

  Not being the morning person, I decided this morning to ge tup early and get some things done. I planned for the garden, and mowing mainly, some weeding. I let the chickens out and drove the horse (4 wheeler) out to see why I was hearing a cow bawling so much. I found the neighbors calf on my side of that rickety old west fence, and momma on the other side. Now I got off my horse (ha) and had a talk wiht her, the little heifer, but boy was she a bitch. Eventually she wound up in my cow lot in the sick pen, and old sammy came and loaded her. So I finally got my cup of coffee in, and now im deciding on whether to jump on the mower, or go to the gym.  oh the stress!
  I took care of the dyke chicken situation, and when the dykes decided they were real roosters, and jumped me, I shot one. Why feed the sucker? So that was that and I was down to one roo. I thought. later I heard TWO roosters crow at  the same time! I mthinkiing that company i got these "pre sexed " pullets at must really suck! So the next roo decided to get all roostery on me, and poof. Terminated. so now Im down to the least dominate dyke-roo of the 3, and maybe Ill keep him. Hes a black roo, and I enjoy hearing the cockledoodledoo.
  now where the hells my eggs!!??? they were supposed to start laying in june!! HELLO? its july!!! Im hanging a calendar next to a chopping block inside the hen house tonight. (ill have to learn to skin and clean one then!)
  The new shop building is going up on the 8th, and I cant wait! Finally to get all that stuff out of my single car garage, and have room again. man if I get that last fence line redone, Im gonna look downright prosperous!
  Surely then Ill be able to land me a woman that fits me! hmmmm. Maybe I should work on gettin a truck.... she might like that. Hope she can back a trailer.
  
  
  
  
  2:41 PM

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• Jun 11, 2008

  my hen is a dyke?

  Chickens... boy they are alot of work. by the time you coon proof the stupid hen house, put shavings in the floor, and straw in the next boxes, your already give out. but then you go get chicks, that are garoonteeeeed to be hens when they grow up. I got twenty, but it seems there is something amiss. One of the hens starting crowing...or trying to. At first it was funny, but then I realized, my hen is a dyke. dang it. I mean after all they garooonnteeeed it to be a egg layin hen when she grew up. But she did something...i dont know what, and now she crows like a man. She even p;inches the other girls, and I know shes lookin at them like....well like a rooster would! They are all p;retty to look at, and this month I should get my first fresh eggs. from all but one. cuz dyke chickens dont lay eggs, and if they did, i dont think Id want to eat it.
  I had just accepted this little twist of dykyness fate ....when i heard another hen crow. dang it. two dyke chickens. whats next? I wonder if a dyke chicken tastes like a regular rooster ? hmmmm?
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• Nov 24, 2007

  When it caught on Fire!

  well. I was alittle doubtful when my stepfather drove up that old one ton truck. It sure looksed bad. But I thought hey maybe it runs good.  it was cheap right? So after he left, I got in it and discovered the brake lights dont work, the brakes need work, the windshield wiper dont work, but hey... it runs. well. today I counted the cows. I kept counting 23. Im supposed to have 24. I figure I better go lookin.... but the 4 wheeler was not running. bad battery. I figure,  hey, I have a 1 ton...flatbed. so I fired it up and off I went. ive been sick for a few days.. but I noticed it was hard to turn to the left. and then it just died ...out in the middle of nowhere. Not a road or house in sight. And were was my faithful stupid dog? home. because he knew it was gonna start sleeting. which it did. on my ass as i walked back to the house. I was so mad. Now I have another piece of junk that I have to work on alot... besides that sexy tractor of mine. So I am stewing.... as the step dad drives up to deliever some hay. Thank God the tractor started...then after I unloaded it.... I told him about the truck and we drove his out to look at it. There it was. in all its glory. I showed him the problem. the wiring, which someone had workedon, and wrapped itself around the steering column, and ahd broken and or come umplugged.. and there was no fire. He said..."I never saw anything like that". I said..I never had either. But when I tried the key, it turned over. So i suggested he spray some startin fluid in the carb, while I cranked, and if it started Id drive it back. Thats...when it caught on fire. lol. and something seemed to peck me on the shoulder, and say.... now what do you think? I started laughing...and had to climb up the grill... and under the hood, and put the fire out wiht a rag, and me blowin on it. So the 1 ton is still there. Ill fix it when I fix it. funny.... how my mind works.  something had to catch fire... before I changed gears .... oh well. im inside now where its warm. let it snow.
  Until tomorrow...when i have to feed again.