when the shoe drops

I thought about you. I thought about God. Ive thought about my dreams, and goals. Ive talked to you and God about them both. Sometimes I just wonder if laying down and just letting go of everything wouldn't be better. But then I think about quitting, and my children, and grandchildren.
sigh.

im tired. sometimes I guess life is just.....tiring. it seeps into your bones, into your mind, into your very spirit. not even the chocolate that Im not supposed to have helps.

So I pray. I blog. I listen to the thunder. Its soothing. the rain is more fierce than Id like it to be.... how about a nice soft drizzle. It always feels like some kind of unseen invisible fabric is about to rip apart when it rains like that.

im not sure where im standing at these days. I wish it was as easy as looking down to see where. Just when you think you know,  you find out that the sound you heard was you tripping over something and splatting on the ground. tomorrow is another 12 hour work day. all I can say is …. im tired. things are good, then you look up,.... and its like.....when the other shoe drops....and everything comes to a halt. And hearing whats being said to you, sounds like a foreign language. 

Lord help me to know where Im at, where Im going, and where you want me to be.