it is what it is.... what will you make it?

Im feeling that feeling again. when my mind slows to barely real life... and dwells in some past thought or memory... triggered by a smell, or an email or something. Today I recieved an email from an old "friend".  Since then I have been busy but thoughtful. Today was a good day, but i had trouble getting started. it happens when you dont sleep well, and get up at 5 am.  Sunrises out my front window are always symbolic of a new beginning ...to me.

So i made it to town, then back home. I worked on that stupid engine again... ran 2 tanks of fuel thru it. but it is still dirty. Someday itll run clean again. I piddled around. Its funny how the place changes. I think of how it looked a year ago. and who I was looking at it with.... maybe two years ago. and now.  All kinds of little things that go bump in my mind. So i sit and watch, and wait. Im getting better at it. I am becoming more content doing it. 

Im sorry tumbleweed... i know  you miss ranger. I have missed sparks too. I hate how an animal can affect ones life so much. I know they are going to die. I guess I am supposed to enjoy them, or learn from them, during the time I have with them. I guess I am supposed to do th esame from people. Maybe animals can teach us many things ... about people. or ... just be there to give hugs. I wonder why God made them shed? dang theyd be perfect if they didnt shed hair.

So life goes on. Each day begins. in almost the same way. and each day ends in similar fashion. the sun fades, and shadows creep in. the temp drops... and my body and mind slow down. Thats when it gets harder. So... I do my work. I eat. i get thru the day. I think of them. those in my past.  sometiems I pray for them. sometimes I just wonder what is going on with them. I wonder what i learned, or what they learned from "us". I wonder about where I came from, and where I am heading.

Soon I will paint the "happy room". It will be strange. It will be new. sealing the past. and preparing for the future. Maybe thats what animals , projects, and all that is about. I will try toenjoy what God has for me today. and i will allow tomrrow to come. when it does... I will enjoy that too. with one leg, or with one arm. or with two. its hard to two step with one leg though...

Sometimes... the ride is slow, and sometimes very fast. either way...  Let it be. Just let it be , and enjoy it.